lilmissmorbid

Blowjob Etiquette
1. I don't care WHAT she did in the porn video you saw. Just enjoy what I do, dont compare.
2.I DON'T have to swallow. I choose to.
3. My ears are NOT handles.
4. Push on the top of my head. Only if I ask you to. Last I heard, deep throat had been done. And additionally, do you really WANT puke on your dick?
5. I don't care HOW relaxed you get, it is NEVER OK to fart.
6. Having my period does not mean that it's "hummer week"
7. "Blue Balls" might have worked on high school girls This aint High School any more.
8. If I have to pause to remove a pubic hair from my teeth, don't tell me I've just "wrecked it" for you.
9. Leaving me in bed while you go play video games, smoke a cigarette, watch TV...etc.... immediately afterwards is highly inadvisable if you would like my behavior to be repeated in the future.
10. If you like how I do it, it's probably best not to speculate about the origins of my talent. Just enjoy the moment and be happy that I'm good at it.
11. No, it doesn't particularly taste good. And I don't care about the protein content.
12. No, I will NOT do it while you watch TV, smoke a cigarette, drink, etc....
13. When you hear your friends complain about how they don't get blow jobs often enough, keep your mouth shut. No one likes a bragger.
14. Just because "it's awake" when you get up does not mean I have to "kiss it good morning."


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