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lilitu23

San Francisco

Member Since 2009

Followers 117 Following 134

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Tuesday Aug 18, 2009

Aug 18, 2009
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Tuesday. Another cold grey morning...

About a month ago a job listing went up on Craigslist looking for interns at Pirate Cat Radio. After playing phone tag with the station manager for two days, by the time I got to talk to him he told me the internships were filled. Now they have another Craigslist ad up again. I sent an email reply. Maybe I will get my foot in the door and get to do some DJ'ing. It won't pay anything but I'd love to do that.

I applied to two veterinary clinics last week who had CL ads up looking for vet assistants or receptionists. And I emailed Dion about the lead she mentioned for possibly getting a job at Borders Books where she knows someone in management.

And last night I talked on the phone with someone who works in an agency that helps mentally ill criminal offenders get and keep jobs. She referred me to CVE who might be able to help me. I need help. Bad.

Last night I succeeded in working on this song I started six months ago for my Everything But The Gargoyle project. I am going to try to keep the momentum going and work some more on it today. It's pretty close to finished, all the tracks are recorded and programmed, I just need to tweak the effects on the vocal and then mix it down. I have one or two other EBTG songs I want to do after this one.

Support group at TransThrive this afternoon, then off to Tom Waddell to get my blood tests so I can see if there are any issues relating to my hormone intake. Then maybe over to Berkeley for the pipe circle tonight...

I am feeling in a rut and I've been in this rut for too long. I need a change. A new job. A girlfriend. Something to bring me a sense of purpose and passion. Yeah, I know, purpose and passion are things that come from within, I'm supposed to be able to self-generate meaning in my life and self-motivate for change. I'm not having much luck or success with that. When my cat died 14 months ago, I lost my real reason for being alive, something and someone outside myself who needed me. Since then, I'm just spinning my wheels in the breakdown lane. I'm tired of it all...

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