I have returned from my walkabout. Over the past few day cretin truths were made clear to me. My guide on this self-involved adventure was a transgender marsupial named Connie. I was skeptical at first but after undergoing the ritual of self-enlightenment I was able to rid myself of a few personal demons.
The ritual if anyone is interested in trying it involves a large brown paper bag and a gas soaked rag. (Please note that having a guide comes in handy when you pass out and need someone to chew through the bag to restore oxygen to your noggin.)
What did I learn on this journey you ask.
1. Despite what I may think sometimes, Im not such a bad guy.
2. I have let my fears paralyze my life. Social fears, fear of failure, fear of letting people get to know me, fear of letting someone love me. The list goes on and on. Ive convinced myself that Im better off on my own, isolated. Ive been this way for so long that Ive forgotten what its like to belong anywhere.
3. I have an incredibly negative self body image. I need to work on that. Someone once asked me how I expected anyone else to like me when I dont like myself. Its a good question. My friend cuts me deep sometimes with her honesty but I wouldnt want it any other way. The only answer I have to that question is this; Im a work in progress. Dont give up on me yet.
4. Darth Vader is my father. Boy, I sure didnt see that one coming.
5. I use humor as a shield, but sometimes Im a bit too sarcastic for my own good.
6. Shaving my head was one of the most freeing things Ive ever done. I feel like Ive dropped 30 years of emotional baggage.
Im a moody pain in the ass sometimes. Chances are that, thats not going to go away any time soon. Think of it as part of my charm.
I feel like Ive managed to put some of my demons to rest. Will they stay down? I dont know. All I can tell you is that for right now, Im feeling good.
The old Jack is dead.
The new Jack is ready to stop taking himself so serious and have some fun. So wheres the party?
The ritual if anyone is interested in trying it involves a large brown paper bag and a gas soaked rag. (Please note that having a guide comes in handy when you pass out and need someone to chew through the bag to restore oxygen to your noggin.)
What did I learn on this journey you ask.
1. Despite what I may think sometimes, Im not such a bad guy.
2. I have let my fears paralyze my life. Social fears, fear of failure, fear of letting people get to know me, fear of letting someone love me. The list goes on and on. Ive convinced myself that Im better off on my own, isolated. Ive been this way for so long that Ive forgotten what its like to belong anywhere.
3. I have an incredibly negative self body image. I need to work on that. Someone once asked me how I expected anyone else to like me when I dont like myself. Its a good question. My friend cuts me deep sometimes with her honesty but I wouldnt want it any other way. The only answer I have to that question is this; Im a work in progress. Dont give up on me yet.
4. Darth Vader is my father. Boy, I sure didnt see that one coming.
5. I use humor as a shield, but sometimes Im a bit too sarcastic for my own good.
6. Shaving my head was one of the most freeing things Ive ever done. I feel like Ive dropped 30 years of emotional baggage.
Im a moody pain in the ass sometimes. Chances are that, thats not going to go away any time soon. Think of it as part of my charm.
I feel like Ive managed to put some of my demons to rest. Will they stay down? I dont know. All I can tell you is that for right now, Im feeling good.
The old Jack is dead.
The new Jack is ready to stop taking himself so serious and have some fun. So wheres the party?
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
now eat your cyber cookie