lightbulbjack

Its been a long week. Even taking my nightly Ambien has left me restless. I did find out this week why I feel so good when I takeAmbien and stay awake. It has to do with the way my brain waves change to alpha waves. This is the stat of the brain when you are preparing to sleep. It lowers many of your guards and makes me answer questions more honestly than I think I should sometimes. Im not explaining it very well.

Basically I say whats on my mind and dont worry about what people will think of me. Sometimes I say too much and hurt someones feelings like I did this week.

I feel bad for making them feel bad. This may not make much sense, I am tired, and I just cant sleep.

The Pink House Party.
I want to go but my social anxiety is already kicking in. Im tiring to find reasons not to go. I want to get so I can meet people. And hang out and be normal.

I dont want to go because I dont know a lot of the people who will be there and that will make me nervous. I dont want to be the wallflower all weekend.

So do I face my fear and go and hang out with people I dont know?

Or do I bail out and do the easy thing, stay home. I feel like such a whinny bitch whenever I get into these moods.

I need sage advice. What should I do?

If I do go I will need a ride. Anyone willing to cart one moredown?