lightbulbjack

Is this all there is to life?

I have to find another job. I hate mine. I used to love it but now I go in and my 9:30 Im ready to say the fuck with it and walk out. I dont of course; I need money. I moved into a new place in December that is turned out to be a bit more expensive than I expected.

The other day in the business section of the paper there was an article about Kodak. I work for Kodak, and what luck, the article was talking about what I do for a living. Or as a Kodak put it, chemical-based photography businesses, which made up the bulk of its profits for over a century, are now in irreversible decline.

Kodak didnt have its shit together and has been playing catch up when it comes to the digital consumer market. So what that means for those of us who work for them is this, we sure appreciate what you have done for us but we need to let you go so our shareholders make more money, and we dont look like total jackasses. Yeah, we totaled screwed up the digital thing, our bad

When my last boss was let go, a coworker asked me how long I thought it would be before they fired us. I said 6 months tops. Its almost 6 months later and Im still here, God help me. So I was wrong, but things arent looking so hot.

Im just so sick of dealing with all the crap that goes on at work. Being the boss has its good points. The bad part about being the boss is that you get stuck with a lot of shitty situations to deal with. Pissed of guest; old machines that are continently breaking down; Clifford the Big Red Dog; my boss who only calls to bitch at me for something or need me to do something foe her, and by the way it has to be done by tomorrow. It just never seems to end.

When I was younger I couldnt wait to grow up. I could stay up late. I would eat whatever I wanted when I wanted. I was going to have this kick ass job that was cool. I was going to have a gorges girlfriend that loved me. I great car, and lots of friends. I could go on and on.

Now that Im older I wish I could be a kid again. I miss recess and snow days. I miss dreaming about all the cool places I was going to visit. I miss getting up in the morning and not having to take a hand full of pills to get through the day. I wasnt going to be like everyone else, I was going to take chances; I was going to live. I was going to BE.

Too much depressing stuff, enough for now.

A users guide to Lightbulbjack version 1.2
I always wanted to try opium.

I miss my mom.

I once hit a kid so hard in the face I knocked out three of his teeth. In my defense, he had it coming.

I first girl I ever fell in love with later married my best friend form high school. Last I knew he was a pig farmer. For those of you lucky enough to have never been anywhere near a pig farm in the middle of summer, let alone work on one, count yourself lucky.

I end almost every post with a It's my way of signing my X on the dotted line.

The second girl I fell in love with ended up living with my now best friend for over a year. Theyre not together anymore, hence us still being friends.

I havent talked to any member of my family in almost a month and a half. Im not sure why.

I forgot to pick up garbage bags at the store.

Right now Im wearing earplugs so I dont have to listen to my friend play Dot Hack on the PS2.

For some reason, I have wondered what pink flamingos taste like. I'm guessing chicken, but you never know.

There are times when I want to go into a grocery store and scream, Soylent Green is People!!! Just to see who gets it.

I want to go skydiving, even though I have vertigo and am afraid of heights. And the fact that Ill most likely piss myself on the way down.

???Question???
Ask me any question you want to know about me. Anything at all, and I'll answer it here in my journal.


p.s.
My apologies to the lovely Bathory for forgetting to mention meeting her at the SG show last Friday.