lexxus

I am going to combust.....ahhhhh!!!!! I am so upset right now. Things just keep getting worse and im not even sure how that is possible...they just are. Goodnight

Not really in the mood to write lately. I think im just tired of dwelling on the fact that im miserable lol. so later/

i cried alot today. I don't think i have had so many things go wrong in one day before... Have you ever been in a position where no matter what you do, its still going to come back to bite you in the butt...well thats how today was. and both roads suck.....I wish there was some far off dirt road i could have gone down....
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So tonight was my first night at work with my schedule back to normal. it rocked hard core...or as julia would say XXX StripCoreXXX lol. Anyhow i think i have been smiling all night for reasons that are no good im sure, but hell at least i have been happy.

Well Im gonna crash now. Have a good night.

AHHHHHHH!!!! I am so tired of everyone and everything. I just dont care anymore, i dont want to hear about it. I have enough problems.

Do you want to know something that i find ironic...The one thing i promised to never do to anyone else...the one thing that hurt me and broke me into a million pieces, that i said i would never want anyone else to feel...i do to others....

I don't do it because i want to hurt them, i guess i do it because im not thinking...
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I have come to the conclusion that i dont even make sence to myself anymore. If im getting sex i wonder why im not getting time, and if i m just getting hang out timei wonder why he doesnt want to fuck me....
Does that make any since at all????

BLAH! Im really tierd. Happy and sad at the same time and not really sure...
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Long day, long night last night. really tired. I should be doing my homework...but im not. i cant seem to get myself motivated to do much of anything lately.

I got a wicked flat tire last night. That was fun! The truck driver who changed it for me decided it was a good idea to inform me that he was a pimp and that you...
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He read all of this tonight....i guess i never really thought that he would ever actually look at it or take the time to read this crap. But tonight he did...while i was on the phone with him. isnt that great. lol.

You know what makes me think, the parts that upset him, wernt theparts where i was crying, or having a compleate mental breakdown...
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I cant do anything right

In a really shitty mood right now. UM....In short:

Bakesale kicked some wicked ass. Much props to Staind they totally rocked the house...

Been up since 7am, really tired. Really pissed...had a great day up until 10 min ago and now im going to atempt to sleep

Just walked in the door from Brendons house...guess going to see him wasnt a good idea....

Blah. anyhow, im a little sleepy considering it's 4 am i guess thats normal. Goodnight to all.

PS I totally forgot to mention that im gonna be a mommy soon....well sortta anyhow...My girlfried is pregnet...LOL So yeah this next year should be interesting to say the least.