lenoredoll

The blankets were tangled around my arms and legs when I woke. Sweat rolled down my sides and the room itself seemed to perspire. I hate waking up to humid darkness. This was a few nights ago, but the days blend and get muddy in my memory. I cant quite feel the difference between an hour and three days ago.

I keep remembering her pretty...
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The fuzz in my dryers lint catcher spread to my hair, my eyes, and then my thoughts. My mind tumbles at the idea of lost socks, frayed edges, and shrunken jeans. I may not be clean, but I smell nice and am neatly folded.

"The end of the something i did not want to end,
Begining of hard times to come.
But something that was not meant to be is done,
And this is the start of what was. "
-the streets, "empty cans"

Shamans burn all their earthly possessions once their training is done. Its a ritual that symbolizes rebirth, much like a phoenix.

I sometimes wish people could burn their pasts. Some memories are just too heavy to carry around, and if these cumbersome histories could turn to ash, the weight would be gone. We could be reborn. We could all fly away.

I dont usually remember my dreams, but when I do, they tend to be very strange. The ones I remember the most vividly tend to be very violent. Maybe this is because Im such a non-violent person that the scary dreams stand out to my conscious self. Whatever the reason, I think Ill write about my dream last night.

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A girl is haunting me....
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There are nights when the darkness itself seems too awake. The city lights make the sky hide in pitch black, and the edges of the world sharpen. Im afraid if I get too close to the edges. Ill cut myself and bleed to death. Then in the morning, when the sunlight softens everything, the news will report of some random mysterious death. Authorities will assume...
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I found myself in the sky one day. I looked pretty happy.

I liked how the clouds were fluffy in the distance but cold and wet in reality. The lining wasnt so silver, but it was close enough. I never could get enough of that lining.

Rays of light would warm and brown my skin. Id eventually die of skin cancerbut I still looked pretty...
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I just spent a bunch of hours doing homework and drinking coffee. Now my head is all fuzzy.

And Dan just told me Mitch Hedberg died... I don't know why, but I'm really sad to hear that. I'm even more sad to hear it might be due to a heroin overdose. Such a sad sad way for a funny man to die.

Just incase you...
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I hung out with the oh-so-cute otoki today, and you should all be jealous. Jealous I tell you!

On a similiar note, I just found out Carla Gugino has a nude scene in Sin City. Now that in itself is worth the price of admission. I've been excited about this movie since I read the comics. I'm even more excited and in more ways, hehe.