lenabug

Nothing feels right today. i just wish tomorrow would come and i could get this stupid doctors appointment over with. i hate feeling this way. i can't even go anywhere without getting upset and crying. I keep trying to look like i'm ok for daniel becuz i don't know how he feels. he keeps tellin me everythings gonna be ok and i wanna think that but in the back of my head i keep thinkin what if....I love him so much and i love him for bein there for me he's amazing. But he knows i'm not ok. I wanna just lay on his chest and cry but for some reason i just can't. I dont wanna be around anyone. i even turned down goin to the basement to smoke with tha boys. how sad somethin i never turn down. i guess i want a clear head. i dunno. i need help grrr. my mind is racing i feel so many different things but i definitely dont feel like i have anywhere to go.