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lego_

Member Since 2003

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Reflections and echoes

May 21, 2021
5
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Took the bait and signed up again, just to see what's new.

It's fascinating looking around, seeing who's still here and who left a long time ago; how people have changed and how I see people I knew years ago-- their now-dormant SG profiles trapped in amber-- in a different light now.

I joined the site back in 2003 because I saw an article about SG in a copy of Kerrang and I was fascinated by the alternative community they represented. I couldn't have known what a significant choice it was at the time; I just wanted to see more of Mary's boobs. At the time I was 21, a student and-- looking back-- pretty green. I had done a bit of living by that stage and seen some stuff, but SG opened my eyes to a whole world of culture that I had been isolated from, growing up. It was simultaneously daunting and exhilarating: I was hooked on exploring all the avenues and finding out what was good and bad about them. It felt verboten and yet like I was somehow becoming more myself, the more I discovered.

I'm nearly 40 now, and I'm glad for that phase of my life. You could argue that I wasted many hours-- weeks, even-- of my life on here, in groups and Chat, when I could have been out and about, living my young life with friends IRL, but so many of the things I learned back then have shaped who I am now, my attitudes and outlook on life. I'm still in touch with several of the people I met through SG and I feel a kind of kinship with them because of that formative time. Our life stories continue as differently as they were back then, slightly more entwined because of the experiences we have shared over the years, and slightly more fucked up by the challenges life throws at us. On the other hand, things that seemed important back then, and people I revered, didn't stand the test of time and eventually faded into the background. I remember their names and faces when I look around SG, but perspective and experience have shown that they held no value for me, long term. That's just life.

Might stick around for a bit this time and see if I can make some new, old friends. The site's quite different to how it used to be, but a lot of the elements are the same as they always were and there's always more to explore in life. Let's see what I missed last time around.

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