lb

Its been a rough few weeks, i feel like everytime my wife and I are OK something happens that makes us not OK, and the part that tears me up the most inside is the fact that, it seems to be a combo of my fault and her unwillingness to be supportive, and what REALLY hurts me is no matter how mush i love her (and i do) i just cant bring myself to fix things, she has kept making the statement "we mistook good friendship for love" and maybe she is right, i mean why cant i fix things, im not saying its all my fault. I feel just run down all the time by the way she yells and just makes me feel like shit, i just dont know what is next. I feel like we have to fix this but should we..i love her, i hate to see her hurt, but maybe one big hurt will stop all the little hurting in time. Im not saying i ever want to end this, cause i dont but you reach a point where you dont know what choice you have. I mean we live in a little shit town that we both hate and that adds stresss but we have to for her job, its only 8 more months. and we just cant break our cycle of fights, and i have Left / been kicked out more then once, i dont know what i want. I love her but i find myself thinking, ok what if i have to get my own place again. Nobody said it would be easy. who knows what is next

-Wish I was too dead to cry
My self-affliction fades
Stones to throw at my creator
Masochists to which I cater-
Stone Sour