I guess I have never realized how much the people who surround me effect my personality and my emotional state.
Since the new roommate has started living in the apartment I have not been the same. He is dark, moody, negative and reclusive. It has been rubbing off on me and I don't like it at all.
My old roommate (the one that moved out as of feb 1st) was a wonderful guy who's name is Atila.
Atila is smart, witty, creative, communicative and fun. He and I would have a good time talking for hours. If there was a problem he would talk to me about it first. Atila has seen me at my worst and I have seen him at his worst. We could cry on each other shoulders and we would re-assure each other that everything (no matter what happens) would be alright. Atila is a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. I totally miss him.
I feel like Jay hates me or he hates himself and projects that on to me. This makes me feel insecure and then I start to do things to make me feel secure. These actions include: latching on to people and being needy. I'll ignore a person's personal space (bubble) because I need physical attention to affirm my self worth. Which is the wrong reason to do it. Why? Because, when I don't get it I get up-set and go in to that dark place and all hell breaks loose.
I admit I like attention (we all do) but needing attention to cover a hole caused by insecurity doesn't cure anything. It just makes things worse.
So I'm giving notice, cutting my losses and moving on.
C'est la vie.
Since the new roommate has started living in the apartment I have not been the same. He is dark, moody, negative and reclusive. It has been rubbing off on me and I don't like it at all.
My old roommate (the one that moved out as of feb 1st) was a wonderful guy who's name is Atila.
Atila is smart, witty, creative, communicative and fun. He and I would have a good time talking for hours. If there was a problem he would talk to me about it first. Atila has seen me at my worst and I have seen him at his worst. We could cry on each other shoulders and we would re-assure each other that everything (no matter what happens) would be alright. Atila is a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. I totally miss him.
I feel like Jay hates me or he hates himself and projects that on to me. This makes me feel insecure and then I start to do things to make me feel secure. These actions include: latching on to people and being needy. I'll ignore a person's personal space (bubble) because I need physical attention to affirm my self worth. Which is the wrong reason to do it. Why? Because, when I don't get it I get up-set and go in to that dark place and all hell breaks loose.
I admit I like attention (we all do) but needing attention to cover a hole caused by insecurity doesn't cure anything. It just makes things worse.
So I'm giving notice, cutting my losses and moving on.
C'est la vie.
I'm just in the process of moving into a fabulous new place.
I'm sure you've got lots of offers but if you need to get away from him for an evening or whatever in the next while, drop me a line.
Maybe you can intro me to some of your fav Lynch?
I'll email you my number...