Prepare for a mammouth Update.
To Begin with, yesterday was my best friends wedding, yes she went through with it and no I didn't object, yet it turned out to be...
Well where the hell do I begin? I shall start with this disclaimer. I am not a typical 'girly girl' I never wear make-up except on smart occasions, i rarely get anything nice done with my hair and I rarely get to wear a pretty dress, so what happens when you try to do all three on the same day... this!
So its 9.45am, 6 hours until show time, I'm sitting in the hairdressers chair getting hair pulled off my face to make photographing the big event a whole lot easier. Queue chavvu hairdressers weilding the biggest can of hairspray I have ever seen in my life about to dump half of it onto my head. Feel like I am responsible for a brand new hole in the ozone layer, but apparently this is needed as its raining outside and my hair has to hold all day. Sitting there feeling like an explosion in a glue factory some woman sticks her nose in and asks how I'm going to get into my dress, Queue the biggest Jinx in the world. 'Well, if the worst comes to the worst I will cut yself out of my t-shirt.' Famous last words.
11.10 am, arrive home, sure enough I did get rained on at the bus stop and hair did hold. Feel like acid rain has mixed with the concoction of crap already in my hair, the fumes are begining to make me feel sick. I grab all the stuff I need, including my gorgeous powder blue dress which is fresh back from the dry cleaners which I've worn twice before and adore. Its the single most expensive thing I have ever purchased with a price tag of 140 ($280) Carefully pack into protective film and head over to the besties where we're all going to get ready together.
12.15 My friend Lucy and I are packed into a teeny tiny room trying for the life of us to get changed, its at this point I pull my dress on and think Jesus this feels tight, and I'd only tried it on on saturday - just before I took it to the cleaners. To my horror my dress had shrunk! I sit there almost in tears thinking my God I can't have put one nough weight in a week for my dress to suddenly not fit anymore surely? Lucy tries to calm me down and says she'll help zip me into it, even if it is going to be a little tight, we yank the zip up then it gets stuck. We tug the dress to try and free the jammed zip and nothing. Shit. No worries, we'll undo it and try again. Zip won't budge. In the next 15 minutesa total of 6 people wrestle with my zip as I try in vain to cover my modesty. At one point we even got the plyers out to try and get a firmer grip but to no avail.
At this point everyone is panicking, so I ring home and tell ym mum to find me another dress to wear. She asks me why and I explain the sad situation. She goes apreshit. I arrive home with my dress stuck around my waist and my t-shirt, its going no-where fast. I get inside and this thing is still going no-where. Its well and truly stuck. only one thing for it. We took the scissors to it, i cried. My mum cried. I was gutted, grabbed another dress and ran for it.
All I can say is, I'm glad it happened to me and not the bride, because that really would have been awful. When we looked at my cut dress today it looked noticabley smaller. The cleaners must have shrunk it by at least 2 dress sizes and they charged me 15 for the privilege. They will be paying I can assure you!
So we all go to the wedding its all lovely, everyone had a great time but then mother nature decides to stick her oar in and make it piss it down with rain in time for the photos to start, the OTHEr job I was there to do. I had already failed as a bridesmaid and here I am failing as a photographer thanks to the shitty weather. Queue more sticky hair product being added to my head and I think, Jesus I'm never getting rid of this hair.
Arrived home late last night too knackered to wrestle with hair so slept with hair still glued in place and half my make-up still on.
This morning I spent an hour and a half in the shower washing all the crap out of my hair. my scalp is red raw and flaing, its disgusting so I'm sitting here with my winter hat on to cover all the crap on myhead.
I am feeling completely defeated!
RIP Blue dress, it was fun while it lasted.
To Begin with, yesterday was my best friends wedding, yes she went through with it and no I didn't object, yet it turned out to be...
Well where the hell do I begin? I shall start with this disclaimer. I am not a typical 'girly girl' I never wear make-up except on smart occasions, i rarely get anything nice done with my hair and I rarely get to wear a pretty dress, so what happens when you try to do all three on the same day... this!
So its 9.45am, 6 hours until show time, I'm sitting in the hairdressers chair getting hair pulled off my face to make photographing the big event a whole lot easier. Queue chavvu hairdressers weilding the biggest can of hairspray I have ever seen in my life about to dump half of it onto my head. Feel like I am responsible for a brand new hole in the ozone layer, but apparently this is needed as its raining outside and my hair has to hold all day. Sitting there feeling like an explosion in a glue factory some woman sticks her nose in and asks how I'm going to get into my dress, Queue the biggest Jinx in the world. 'Well, if the worst comes to the worst I will cut yself out of my t-shirt.' Famous last words.
11.10 am, arrive home, sure enough I did get rained on at the bus stop and hair did hold. Feel like acid rain has mixed with the concoction of crap already in my hair, the fumes are begining to make me feel sick. I grab all the stuff I need, including my gorgeous powder blue dress which is fresh back from the dry cleaners which I've worn twice before and adore. Its the single most expensive thing I have ever purchased with a price tag of 140 ($280) Carefully pack into protective film and head over to the besties where we're all going to get ready together.
12.15 My friend Lucy and I are packed into a teeny tiny room trying for the life of us to get changed, its at this point I pull my dress on and think Jesus this feels tight, and I'd only tried it on on saturday - just before I took it to the cleaners. To my horror my dress had shrunk! I sit there almost in tears thinking my God I can't have put one nough weight in a week for my dress to suddenly not fit anymore surely? Lucy tries to calm me down and says she'll help zip me into it, even if it is going to be a little tight, we yank the zip up then it gets stuck. We tug the dress to try and free the jammed zip and nothing. Shit. No worries, we'll undo it and try again. Zip won't budge. In the next 15 minutesa total of 6 people wrestle with my zip as I try in vain to cover my modesty. At one point we even got the plyers out to try and get a firmer grip but to no avail.
At this point everyone is panicking, so I ring home and tell ym mum to find me another dress to wear. She asks me why and I explain the sad situation. She goes apreshit. I arrive home with my dress stuck around my waist and my t-shirt, its going no-where fast. I get inside and this thing is still going no-where. Its well and truly stuck. only one thing for it. We took the scissors to it, i cried. My mum cried. I was gutted, grabbed another dress and ran for it.
All I can say is, I'm glad it happened to me and not the bride, because that really would have been awful. When we looked at my cut dress today it looked noticabley smaller. The cleaners must have shrunk it by at least 2 dress sizes and they charged me 15 for the privilege. They will be paying I can assure you!
So we all go to the wedding its all lovely, everyone had a great time but then mother nature decides to stick her oar in and make it piss it down with rain in time for the photos to start, the OTHEr job I was there to do. I had already failed as a bridesmaid and here I am failing as a photographer thanks to the shitty weather. Queue more sticky hair product being added to my head and I think, Jesus I'm never getting rid of this hair.
Arrived home late last night too knackered to wrestle with hair so slept with hair still glued in place and half my make-up still on.
This morning I spent an hour and a half in the shower washing all the crap out of my hair. my scalp is red raw and flaing, its disgusting so I'm sitting here with my winter hat on to cover all the crap on myhead.
I am feeling completely defeated!
RIP Blue dress, it was fun while it lasted.
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BTW that picture looks wonderful!