I dropped my cell phone today, its broken. I sense a long wait in a customer service line tomorrow.
Jimmy Tango once wrote a poem about cell phones:
Cell Phones
We all know about the annoying, inappropriate circumstances in which people use their cell phones. Most recently I observed such ass-ness in a movie theater, at a baseball game (the guy who waives at the camera), and in an airport (it was a volume issue). Knowing that these situations exist, let's take a look at some things we can do to discourage this behavior.
1-Take the person's cell phone out of their hands and rub it on your genitals. As you're doing it, repeat over and over how they're violating certain unwritten rules. What you're doing is no different than rubbing the phone with a cloth, but this will help to drive the point home.
2-Run, don't walk, up to the person and start dry humping their leg. The next words out of their inconsiderate mouth will be, "Uh, let me call you right back." Then they'll hang up the phone. Problem solved.
3-Walk up to the jackass, stop right in front of them, and start doing the "cabbage patch." That's the old dance where you swing your arms around like you're giving a 2-fisted hand job to the Jolly Green Giant. This will cause a similar reaction to option #2. Again, problem solved.
4-Come from their blind side and Terry Tate their ass. The phone will fly out of their hand, and while you've go them on the ground you can explain their error. Nothing quite drives a point home like a good Terry Tate-ing.
These are just a few ideas. Feel free to incorporate your own and share them with others. More importantly, if you're talking on your cell phone loudly in the middle of a restaurant and someone walks up and starts doing an exaggerated version of the Robot, simply admit your error, apologize, and hang up the fucking phone! Thanks.
by Jimmy Tango
THE SOCIALLY ABRASIVE
Jimmy Tango once wrote a poem about cell phones:
Cell Phones
We all know about the annoying, inappropriate circumstances in which people use their cell phones. Most recently I observed such ass-ness in a movie theater, at a baseball game (the guy who waives at the camera), and in an airport (it was a volume issue). Knowing that these situations exist, let's take a look at some things we can do to discourage this behavior.
1-Take the person's cell phone out of their hands and rub it on your genitals. As you're doing it, repeat over and over how they're violating certain unwritten rules. What you're doing is no different than rubbing the phone with a cloth, but this will help to drive the point home.
2-Run, don't walk, up to the person and start dry humping their leg. The next words out of their inconsiderate mouth will be, "Uh, let me call you right back." Then they'll hang up the phone. Problem solved.
3-Walk up to the jackass, stop right in front of them, and start doing the "cabbage patch." That's the old dance where you swing your arms around like you're giving a 2-fisted hand job to the Jolly Green Giant. This will cause a similar reaction to option #2. Again, problem solved.
4-Come from their blind side and Terry Tate their ass. The phone will fly out of their hand, and while you've go them on the ground you can explain their error. Nothing quite drives a point home like a good Terry Tate-ing.
These are just a few ideas. Feel free to incorporate your own and share them with others. More importantly, if you're talking on your cell phone loudly in the middle of a restaurant and someone walks up and starts doing an exaggerated version of the Robot, simply admit your error, apologize, and hang up the fucking phone! Thanks.
by Jimmy Tango
THE SOCIALLY ABRASIVE
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
no gunny is fine...i love him, i could never get rid of him, even if he is expensive. you should get a t-mobile cell phone.