July 15, 2005 2;15 PM
man it sucks not having access to the internet. i decided that i would type up this journal entry and move it online next time i had access to the internet. hopefully that is going to be soon. i have been incredibly sick. it amazes me how cruel of a circle my life is sometimes. i am stressed out which inflames my crohn's disease which makes me sick. however there is no way to get rid of the stress without feeling better. on top of everything else my doctor took me off of some medication which i am having withdrawals from so i get to add that to the rest of being sick. sucks. i wouldn't even write about this shit if i had anything more interesting to write about. lol. i have had to cancel plans with david three times now. i am starting to feel really shitty about that. alienating the few friends that i have sucks....but i always seem to do it whenever i am in a relationship. i wish i was better at life....that i knew better how to handle things and go about things and be the best possible friend to my friends, girlfriend to my boyfriend, sister to my sister. but it never fails. i screw it up somehow. yeah i should quit writing right now though. this is going depressingly downhill. *smile*
July 16, 2005 3:51 AM
so last night was not bad. david took me out to eat. it was nice getting to hang out with him considering that i was JUST talking about the fact that i seemed to be avoiding him. i really didn[t mean for that to be how it was if it was. it took him showing up at the apartment for me to answer. we spent a lot of time talking about josh and how he has been being an asshole to everybody. i hate it when things change, people change. everything is supposed to stay the same. i am supposed to be able to count on people always being there and things always being there dammit. lol. david's mom went to eat with us too seeing how today is her birthday. i was actually the one getting to tag along. i had forgotten how much i do not like david's mom. grrrr.....the woman is so rude to him and is so needy. i want to slap her around every time david does something for her.
sometimtes brooklyn can be so incredibly sweet and sometimes downright infuriating. i will say that we have the most fucked up relationship of anyone that i have dated. i guess rhings are okay though. i still like him. that counts for something right? usually at this point i am completely tired of the person.
harry potter baby! you better believe it. i wish i had thought far enough ahead to pick number 5 up from the house and reread it before i pick up number 6.
i have fucked my sleep schedule all up. there is no hope for it at this point. i am trying to sleep and i can't. oh yeah...and my new game obsession is Fable. even though i actually don't really like the game, i think they have somehow laced it with crack bc i can't quit playing the thing. dammit man.
July 16, 2005 10:11 PM
david called earlier. "What are you doing?" my reply: "reading harry potter." "DAMMIT!" "What?" i asked. his reply: "I called Morgan and asked him if he wanted to do anything and his said that he can't. he's reading harry potter." lol. classic.
typing on a keyboard is a lot harder than a regular keyboard. i make a LOT more mistakes. normally i am not the kind to go back and correct mistakes either. but i have to on here for what i am writing to be legible. besides harry potter have i done anything. the answer to that is yes. i cleaned the apartment. and talkd to luis for a while. besides that? nothing.
man it sucks not having access to the internet. i decided that i would type up this journal entry and move it online next time i had access to the internet. hopefully that is going to be soon. i have been incredibly sick. it amazes me how cruel of a circle my life is sometimes. i am stressed out which inflames my crohn's disease which makes me sick. however there is no way to get rid of the stress without feeling better. on top of everything else my doctor took me off of some medication which i am having withdrawals from so i get to add that to the rest of being sick. sucks. i wouldn't even write about this shit if i had anything more interesting to write about. lol. i have had to cancel plans with david three times now. i am starting to feel really shitty about that. alienating the few friends that i have sucks....but i always seem to do it whenever i am in a relationship. i wish i was better at life....that i knew better how to handle things and go about things and be the best possible friend to my friends, girlfriend to my boyfriend, sister to my sister. but it never fails. i screw it up somehow. yeah i should quit writing right now though. this is going depressingly downhill. *smile*
July 16, 2005 3:51 AM
so last night was not bad. david took me out to eat. it was nice getting to hang out with him considering that i was JUST talking about the fact that i seemed to be avoiding him. i really didn[t mean for that to be how it was if it was. it took him showing up at the apartment for me to answer. we spent a lot of time talking about josh and how he has been being an asshole to everybody. i hate it when things change, people change. everything is supposed to stay the same. i am supposed to be able to count on people always being there and things always being there dammit. lol. david's mom went to eat with us too seeing how today is her birthday. i was actually the one getting to tag along. i had forgotten how much i do not like david's mom. grrrr.....the woman is so rude to him and is so needy. i want to slap her around every time david does something for her.
sometimtes brooklyn can be so incredibly sweet and sometimes downright infuriating. i will say that we have the most fucked up relationship of anyone that i have dated. i guess rhings are okay though. i still like him. that counts for something right? usually at this point i am completely tired of the person.
harry potter baby! you better believe it. i wish i had thought far enough ahead to pick number 5 up from the house and reread it before i pick up number 6.
i have fucked my sleep schedule all up. there is no hope for it at this point. i am trying to sleep and i can't. oh yeah...and my new game obsession is Fable. even though i actually don't really like the game, i think they have somehow laced it with crack bc i can't quit playing the thing. dammit man.
July 16, 2005 10:11 PM
david called earlier. "What are you doing?" my reply: "reading harry potter." "DAMMIT!" "What?" i asked. his reply: "I called Morgan and asked him if he wanted to do anything and his said that he can't. he's reading harry potter." lol. classic.
typing on a keyboard is a lot harder than a regular keyboard. i make a LOT more mistakes. normally i am not the kind to go back and correct mistakes either. but i have to on here for what i am writing to be legible. besides harry potter have i done anything. the answer to that is yes. i cleaned the apartment. and talkd to luis for a while. besides that? nothing.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I had to deal with those books for like two weeks at work (I work for UPS) and it drove me crazy.
Oh...glad your feeling better by the way.