ladollyvita

tomorrow is my 26th bday, and just as usual, i have nothing planned. i like it this way. i like being home, eating dinner, and enjoying the company of family. i dont like making a big deal of my bday. i requested the day off, but decided that im going to go in anyways. i have a lot of work to do, and thanksgiving weekend...
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OMG. today, i am one happy, happy girl.

im about to go to bed with a tummy ache from nervously gobbling shitty pizza glued to cnn but O.M.G. OBAMA!!!!! *eeee!!!!! so happy*

now im just waiting for props 4 and 8 to be rejected and i can rest somewhat easy.

congratulations, america

cooking and working out is going pretty great, and i fly to toronto for work in a couple of weeks which im excited about.

oh AND i won the football pool at work!! so i made $120! i donated like 30 of it to someone who is doing the aids walk...jeeze...what was i thinking...LOL jk...

AND im 11lbs closer to being comfortable enough with my...
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so i got really bored the other night (last night) and cut my own bangs. id never done it before, and cant tell whether i love it or hate it LOL it's somewhere in between that (...like it, maybe? haha).

femcon, lexapro, and mickey d's have helped me pack on 20lbs. i think thats what i dont like too much about my face - it's...
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things are lookin up! well, minus the im-so-broke-i-almost-sold-myself-on-craigslist brief brief experience, but hey, it was funny at the time haha

i cry about luna less, and am starting to make that transition from being desperately sad to looking back with love and fond memories. i miss that puppyface.

and i actually started going to the gym every day and watching that i dont eat as...
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every time i think i've found a great guy who cares, turns out hes the same old asshole who just wants to get fucked.

seriously.

i hate my life right now. i hate myself for makign stupid choices. and i hate that IM crying over it.

i want to disappear....

the sad part is, i have no one to go to right now. and that...
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i miss luna so much.....i thought we had another 10 years at least together and i cant believe my little baby was taken from me so suddenly....

it sounds so cliche, but if i had known that that was the last time i was gonna see her, i would have smooched her doggy lips one last time and called her my smoochie head and hugged...
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so years later i finally got it together and registered. the girls here are beautiful. definitely consumed 4 hours of my night.

sunday nights always make me sad....i should be looking forward to a whole new week but until school is over and while work is insane, i just dont like thinking about waking up on mondays.

sigh...