lackadaisiac

Damnit, why do I do this to myself?

I was watching "The House of Sand and Fog" and it brought up wonderful/terrible memories.

I remember driving out to the coast, another lesson, how to drive stick. We drove past hotels with blown out windows. We drove by the crests of sailboats protruding from the water.

Later the rain came.

I remember feeling so uncomfortable away from home, but you were there. Under the sound of that pouring rain I finally understood what it was to make love.

I think about this at least a dozen times a day. John tells me I'm living in the past. At the same time I can't heal....Another year....