l1vingdeadgurl

So I fell in love with a beautiful stranger
It's just an arrangement
He'll leave the first light of day
This one goes out
To my beautiful stranger
He slipped so quietly away

They say the sense of smell is closely related to memories.
It's not smalls that make me remember. It's passing things, strangers resemblance, a shirt that would be perfect on you, a book you would love to read, a greeting card you'd find funny, even things you'd find sad.

My mind and my health is failing me, but I remember every single message and word.
Yesterday I had that inner voice that I normally ignore, tell me it's time.
To let you go
To bury your love
To enjoy the sun again
To stop crying
To focus on my career
To be content with never loving again
To being alone, because no matter the company I keep, without you, I'm alone.

I believe deeply in dreams, and he comes to me in them with his "holier than though" attitude I used to be in love with. He tells me " I told you so, he'll never love you, he's not for you"

I scoffed and ignored and then he died and the world went to shit.

I made a promise I cannot break.
I said goodbye. One word. So much meaning.
He'll never know if I'm cured, if I'm sicker, if I'm here.
I'll never know how long he has.

Goodbye Stone,
My beautiful stranger.