l1vingdeadgurl

6 more down the hatch and those familiar feelings return and I am floating and flying and nothing in the world can hurt me, or make me cry or make me scream and yell. The sun starts shining its gorgeous rays of yellow, abandoning the pale mute jaundiced color it held this past week. The sky returns blue, I open my arms and welcome it in because nothing can hurt me now. Not even you. I shower and feel the boiling hot water sear my skin until I cant stand it. It washes the old pain away and brings on a new kind of pain, a pain I can control, the kind of pain I can thrive on. I'll go over to his house later and I will lay in his arms and forget where I am, even if its momentarily. The nightmares will stop, he will kiss the almost healed scars on my wrists and tell me its going to be ok. I think this time I may believe him. An unlikely soul, and unlikely friend, he makes me laugh like no one else, even when I want to cry. I dont know where I will end up tomorrow, but as long as he is there it will be perfect, just how it was intended.