kumquat

i am but a sullen girl.
sullen girl.

i am also a hungry girl.
alas.
there is nothing i feel like eating.

that must be why i'm a sullen girl.

i want to get all gussied up and go somewhere.
i want conversations.
and stroking away fallen hair.

i think i need some books.
books suck my brain away.
sometimes they suck my pain away.

once my lover...but now my friend.

i want to test myself.
i want to see what i can do.
i want to be brazen.
i want to do whatever comes to mind.
spontaneous.
whimsical perhaps?

let's push limits.
the same isn't any good.

i'll let you see me.
i'll covet your regard.
i'll invade your demeanor.

i've been brought ribena and milk.
but that silly two percent business still.
i wonder if i even like proper milk anymore.

i want bling.
tea parties.
sleep overs.
silliness.
i think silliness is what i desire most of all.

i've been a bad, bad girl.
..don't you tell me to deny it.
i've been wrong and i want to suffer for my sins..

[yes, in case you hadn't noticed i'm quoting fiona apple as she sings into my ear.]

let's play dress up baby.