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ktsmurf

Corvallis

Member Since 2005

Followers 6 Following 6

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Thursday May 12, 2005

May 11, 2005
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Caution: Long rambling post ahead!
---

This town is too damned small.

I had the strangest experience tonight. After work I went over to chill with my brother for awhile. When I got there my friend Ben was there with his new girlfriend, who went to school with my little sister in middle school. When I first met her, she was an eleven year old who went to church every sunday. It was very jarring to hear her talking about smoking pot and having sex, especially with one of my friends. My mind is still trying to reconcile these two disparate images. Very odd. It surprised Ben that we knew each other, and I think is surprised Carrie as much as it did me to run into each other there, of all places.

I quit smoking cigarettes (again!) last night. After not having smoked for four days, I smoked the last five I had. I wouldn't be able to buy anymore until friday, so I just decided to stop. I can't be smoking when I'm healing my tongue piercing (six more weeks), so I may as well just stop. I don't know how long it will last this time, but I think it will last at least a few months.

I'm starting to remember all of those goals I was focusing on around the first of the year. I have some focus and direction to my life again. I'm organizing my life again. I get a bonus check on Friday; I'm trying to budget the money wisely so that I can accomplish several goals. I feel like I'm embarking on a life makeover. I want to get myself set up such that I can move to a new apartment, pay off my car, possibly move up a little at work, and start looking at part time school. I really feel a desire to improve myself. It's going to be work, but it will be so rewarding.

I'm embarking on the job thing for a couple of reasons. I'm starting to get bored again, like I'm not really being challenged anymore, and I want to show the managers that I have initiative and drive, because they already know that I can learn how to do almost any task they give me, and do it well. There is some talk of a new postion in information systems opening up, and I want it. I've expressed this desire to our HR manager, and she promised to keep me advised, which is an excellent sign. We've talked a bit about it actually. I was explaining my desire to study computers when I go back to school, and she brought up the possible job. So now I need to start busting ass and showing people what a wonderful employee I am. I've started volunteering for optional trainings, and I've been offering to help fill in a lot mor than usual. I've even been working overtime, which is a rarity at my job. Usually when you start doing that, they try to give you a salary, so they don't have to pay overtime anymore. Since I am aiming specifically for a salary, this is a good thing. If I got it, I could go to school part time, and save up some significant bank too. A few years of that, and I'd be set to go to school full time. I just need to keep focused and keep impressing the bosses. I can do this.

I've also discovered I actually want to eat healthily again, so I've been losing more weight. This is awesome. I'd kinda hit a plateau. I'm only thirty pounds from my goal, and fifteen pounds from having a normal BMI. I'm so excited. I've got a family history of high cholesterol and heart issues, so this is really important to me. Luckily I've always had the pulse and blood pressure of a marithon runner, but I used to be significantly overweight. This has been a significant struggle for me, and the end is finally in sight. I think when I complete my overall goal of 100 pounds, I'll post before and after pics so people can see how very significant the change has been. And to think, I owe it all to eating right and exercising. Funny how that works. My gift to myself will be a complete new wardrobe. I will get rid of all my "fat clothes." I'm trying to get rid of a bunch of stuff anyway, because I own way more clothing than I need or wear. This will help a lot.

I think I'm going to grow my hair out again. I don't know how long I'll let it get, but I was really enjoying it before I shaved it, and now that I have my tattoo, I don't need to buzz it anymore. I really liked having my natural hair color, but I think I'm going to dye some spots different colors. I've been thinking that rainbow fish would look really awesome for summer, especially on short fuzzy brown hair. Time to get a cookie cutter. If I take vitamins, I could do it in two or three weeks. Rockin!

Well, I think I've gibbered on enough for now. Anyone else have any plans, or are you just living life one day at a time?
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
red_flynn:
Well I'm glad you liked the pics and thanks for the compliments. I was a bit nervous posting them, so I'm glad I got some positive support. blush
Credit goes to my photographer for the angles though.
May 12, 2005
uncaringmachine:
Nothing going on here this weekend with me. I'm going to buy a scanner to scan my comics into the comp to put on a website, and see Unleashed, but that's about it.
May 14, 2005

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