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ktsmurf

Corvallis

Member Since 2005

Followers 6 Following 6

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Tuesday Feb 22, 2005

Feb 21, 2005
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Wow, this is the first night in a little while that i've been home for a significant amount of time. My social life has exploded in the past week, which is good and bad. Well, ok, its pretty much just good, because i have some really fantastic friends who put with my being a general putz at times. the only bad thing i can think of is that it cuts into my time alone on the computer, which honestly is a lameass complaint.

I think i'm in a really wierd emotional place right now, because i was talking with a friend today, and he mentioned that he never wanted kids when he was my age, but now that he's older, he'd kind of like a couple of girls. I've been thinking about that, and the main response from the depths of my brain is that while i don't really want kids at this point, i think i'd be willing to bear this mans offspring, because i really like being around him. stupid reasoning i know, especially since i am not even remotely stable at this point, and kids would totally fuck up my current lifeplan. meh, maybe its just knee-jerk reaction to the fact that he's moving to france for a while in a few months, and i'm really going to miss him. i discovered this when i asked him about a possible housemate arrangement, and he said he would, except that he's moving so soon. Oh well, there's still time to hang out, and there's always the glory of email. maybe i can go visit him in paris, who knows.

in other random ramblings, i have decided that enough is enough when it comes to my pansyassed behavior towards cute shopper boy, and the next time i get the opportunity, i'm going to attempt to ask him out. i really think he's too shy to ever do it himself, but either i'm totally retarded or he is at least marginally interested in me. he's the only nonfriend who always smiles and says hi or waves, and he's been really complimentary of late. maybe he's scared because he just thinks i'm being nice because i'm at work. we have quite a bit in common though, at least from what i've managed to glean from our conversations, and i'm really getting tired of this feeling of limbo. time to get off my ass and do something about it. the worst he can say is no, and then i'd be exactly where i am now, except without the uncertainty. wish me luck.

Well, other than giant props to Leslie for hosting movie night two nights in a row, i guess thats about it for now. Goodnight.

P.S. I just realized that i love type o negative. its been way too long since i've listened to them, and they are rocking me in such a way that my socks are unable to stay on my feet. yeah, ok, that was random and verbose, but whatever.
akathisia:
Is cute shopper boy the same one i am thinking you are thinking of? The scruffy East Coast computer science major? He seems really nice, if that is who you are talking about anyway.

Awww, i love you. Its nice to have people over too. I need to take a break though. I'm having self esteem issues about the state of my house. i fuckin suck at cleaning, or caring about doing it.....but i am feeling bad about it and that is effecting me.

Ah, don't have babies. They take at least 16-30 years to get rid of, dependining on the kid (and whether or not Joseph is any indication wink heehee)
Feb 22, 2005

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