krystalstarr

Great. Wonderful. Fantastic.. Valentine's Day. SHUTUP! STOP BEING SO HAPPY! It's not a fun day for single people. Anyways, more randomness just for you guys brought to you by Halitosis Jones

"i just woke up, i thought i had to burp, but when it came out, it' sure didn't taste like no burp.
....and it couldn't be my breath cuz my breath's never that bad....
...so the only thing it could have been was a fart.
how'd it get all the way up there?
was it a confused fart?
i didn't know farts could get confused.
well, aparently this one did.
i knew i prolly had shitty breath cuz i just woke up and all, but i didn't know i actually had "shitty" breath.
that's shitty.
i almost fell out of my chair.
it took me off guard, as fart burps often do i suppose.
or, is this the only fart burp ever?
i've never heard of it before.
maybe i'm the only one that's ever had it before.
oh shit.....maybe this is going to turn into like a special power....
oh no.
imagine bein on one of those crime fightin teams like the x-men, and your the one who has breath that knocks people out.
how embarassing.
what would your superhero name be?
"Shiteater Man!", or maybe,"Night Turd!", or"The Brown Lantern!"
oh no.
"Pooperman!"...."Halitosis Jones!"......
they'll prolly make me wear a brown outfit.
and they'll make me say cheesey lines to hot chicks in movies like,"I'm Crapman"but i'll whisper it kind of....oh no.
this is depressing.
i don't even wanna stop crime now.
go ahead commit a crime right now, see if i care.
i'm Crapman, and i'm gonna go brush my teeth now.
and no one can stop me!
mhuahhhahahahah!
wait....maybe i can be a bad guy?
i've always wanted to be a bad guy.
it's stil embarassing.
"Quick! we have to stop the Pooper once and for all!"
i'm gonna go brush my teeth.....
twice.
go away."

Brush up, REALLY brush up.