Warning: If you dont like reading about other peoples problems, Take your criticism elsewhere NOW and read no further.
My life has been nothing but disappointments lately. Even when something awesome happens it always seems to get fucked over by some little thing that shouldnt even matter but it fucks it all up anyways because I just dealt with 20 other "little" problems.. I cant organize my thoughts very well right now. But Im going to try.. Just keep in mind that each of the following situations involves a lot more details than I can even explain.
The food stamps people took away my food stamps because I couldnt get them the paperwork they need. The guy that was my boss when I worked at Dunkin Donuts us supposed to give me a paper saying I dont work there anymore, and my last 3 check dates and amounts. &He hasnt gotten me the paper yet.. For no reason. He just wont do it. So my fridge is empty, I've been thirsty for 2 days and hungry for a week and theres nothing I can do about it. I cant even drink the water here because its disgusting.
My boyfriend FINALLY told me he loved me, on his own, with no prompts from me.. That should be good news but it doesnt FEEL like good news. I feel like he's just telling me what I want to hear, no matter what. I cry every day and freak out for no apparent reason, and I apologize out my ass about it but I cant stop myself.. and he just says the same thing in the same voice every time."Its okay. It doesnt bother me. Stop apologizing" It just makes me cry more.. He doesnt know how to show me he cares. Maybe he doesnt care at all, and he's just pretending to shut me up.
My boyfriends friends all hate me. They think they can walk all over me because Dave doesnt know how to stand up for me. He cant just say to them "Hey dude dont disrespect my girlfriend." Maybe he doesnt know he's supposed to do something, Or again.. maybe he just doesnt care.
One of Daves friends, Jared, Has owed me 50 dollars for bout a year now. Every once in a while I kindly remind him, But today I just got tired of his shit. He thinks he's my boyfriends best friend but he's not at all. He only ever comes over to ask Dave for money. The reason he owes me 50 is because when we were moving the couch we had didnt fit in our new apartment so Jared took it and agreed to pay 50 dollars for it. Today when I asked him for the money, he basically said it wasnt gunna happen. So I got pissed and asked him what the fuck hos problem with me was and he said this bullshit about Dave GIVING it to him. But that never happened. Its MY couch, Dave had nothing to do with it.
The biggest problem of all is that I cry, Every day. I get pissed or upset at Dave even if he hasnt done anything. I dont know how to fix me and even though I know Dave would never leave me, I think he'll want to if I keep this up.. and even though he wont leave me it'll be obvious that his heart has left. And thinking about that only makes me cry more.. I know everything will be better if I could only fix myself. The way I feel right now, everything is my fault and if something isnt right its because of something I've done. Which honestly its true right now, Im digging myself into deeper holes.
I need help and I cant get it. Im hopeless and lost.
My life has been nothing but disappointments lately. Even when something awesome happens it always seems to get fucked over by some little thing that shouldnt even matter but it fucks it all up anyways because I just dealt with 20 other "little" problems.. I cant organize my thoughts very well right now. But Im going to try.. Just keep in mind that each of the following situations involves a lot more details than I can even explain.
The food stamps people took away my food stamps because I couldnt get them the paperwork they need. The guy that was my boss when I worked at Dunkin Donuts us supposed to give me a paper saying I dont work there anymore, and my last 3 check dates and amounts. &He hasnt gotten me the paper yet.. For no reason. He just wont do it. So my fridge is empty, I've been thirsty for 2 days and hungry for a week and theres nothing I can do about it. I cant even drink the water here because its disgusting.
My boyfriend FINALLY told me he loved me, on his own, with no prompts from me.. That should be good news but it doesnt FEEL like good news. I feel like he's just telling me what I want to hear, no matter what. I cry every day and freak out for no apparent reason, and I apologize out my ass about it but I cant stop myself.. and he just says the same thing in the same voice every time."Its okay. It doesnt bother me. Stop apologizing" It just makes me cry more.. He doesnt know how to show me he cares. Maybe he doesnt care at all, and he's just pretending to shut me up.
My boyfriends friends all hate me. They think they can walk all over me because Dave doesnt know how to stand up for me. He cant just say to them "Hey dude dont disrespect my girlfriend." Maybe he doesnt know he's supposed to do something, Or again.. maybe he just doesnt care.
One of Daves friends, Jared, Has owed me 50 dollars for bout a year now. Every once in a while I kindly remind him, But today I just got tired of his shit. He thinks he's my boyfriends best friend but he's not at all. He only ever comes over to ask Dave for money. The reason he owes me 50 is because when we were moving the couch we had didnt fit in our new apartment so Jared took it and agreed to pay 50 dollars for it. Today when I asked him for the money, he basically said it wasnt gunna happen. So I got pissed and asked him what the fuck hos problem with me was and he said this bullshit about Dave GIVING it to him. But that never happened. Its MY couch, Dave had nothing to do with it.
The biggest problem of all is that I cry, Every day. I get pissed or upset at Dave even if he hasnt done anything. I dont know how to fix me and even though I know Dave would never leave me, I think he'll want to if I keep this up.. and even though he wont leave me it'll be obvious that his heart has left. And thinking about that only makes me cry more.. I know everything will be better if I could only fix myself. The way I feel right now, everything is my fault and if something isnt right its because of something I've done. Which honestly its true right now, Im digging myself into deeper holes.
I need help and I cant get it. Im hopeless and lost.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
mikedbmxvw:
Go on to somebody higher up on the chain, IE her boss and tell that person your senario and how both your employer and the case worker have been both jacking you around. The same thing goes with your boss at Dunkin, just go up to the store owner/franchiseer if the guy thats been jerking you off is just a line level manager. Sometimes you gotta get a little charged up to get things done.
remod66:
Sending you every positive vibe at my disposal--I know how rough it is and you're more than free to vent... you'll receive no criticism from me.