kou

So finally it's over between the Boyfriend and me...
I'm sad...
I feel stupidly sad and i'm on the stage where i'm wondering if i did the right thing or if i'm going to regret this in a week, a month, a year or a decade...
I want to run and run and run and run..
he was wonderful, i pretty much have nothing but good things to say about him, 'cept for one of two incidents in which i disagreed with his methods but.. he was always such an amazing boy... I'm going to miss him like crazy...

it's scary to notice how much i can miss someone that was already absent... i can't understand it...

A few minutes ago i went to my closet and looked for a pajama, i found his Placebo hoodie... his favorite, the one he left here just so i could remember him...
I was doing fine... but then i started to cry...
I'm wondering, should i send it back to him? what should i do with it? Should i put it in a box with all our pictures, all our memories... now that i notice i just realized that i never met his handwriting...
I wear a bracelet around my wrist and i just can't cut it yet... i'm not brave enough...
I'm gonna miss him so much...

Kou