koolthing

15 hours later, and I have finally made it "home"
We had 15 minutes together.
A heart wrenching smile, and a huge hug from a child filled with unconditional love.

* I am still smiling *

I remember playing house
And I thought it would last forever.

She made me feel like anything was possible
Through broken dreams and promises it may still have been

I remember when she danced for me, and the world melted away
Those words still haunt me, in the dead hours of night while I struggle to make peace

I keep grasping for tattered threads, but...
Read More

I stare into the void watching and waiting
but nothing comes, nothing...
hold my breath until it burns lungs and lips blister blue
but nothing comes, nothing...
cut once twice - am I still alive
need to feel something because the nothing is too much

I look to the monkeys for guidance
their blind, deaf, and mute response seems appropriate now
played like a fool,...
Read More

Thanks for the encouragement.

Now - I am trying to get over being so sensitive...
I guess I really shouldn't care what a complete stranger has to say about me, and it is pretty pathetic that i was worried about it...right?

So on to the next one!

a long, long day. from a freak out call in the middle of the night - to a...
Read More

In a Google search return...

changed the login...

Hi Everyone!

Hope tomorrow shapes up a bit better than today has been...*tired*
3 hours of sleep and 9 of driving...

But I got to see the SO!!!

At the end of the day - it is the little things that count.

SO arrives today - the moment I have been looking forward to for weeks. I have been completely unrealistic, however, in my expectations of this moment. I hope I haven't set myself up for a HUGE crashing moment.

I am exhausted, and praying - although I am not a religious type...I haven't slept, and probably won't.

OI!

We will talk about all of that later....
Read More

Another long day in LA...
Slept at my sister's house and went on a Starbucks run pretty early so I could struggle with the AOL connection coffeed up enough to last through the dialup ordeal...
I spoke with the SO this morning, which - as usual threw me into a downward spiral. Everything has been so good lately and she managed to crush all of...
Read More

First SG Hookup!

Yesterday...
6:30 AM - scrambled out of bed to get up to my little sister's house - she had a conference in Pasadena @ The Hilton about traumatized children (she is a shrink). 7:45 while sitting in Starbucks I realized I had forgotten my US power supply, and I was not going to be able to accomplish anything...promptly started ringing everyone I...
Read More

I have not posted as much as usual...Mom was kind enough to hook me up with a copy of Pattern Recognition...

--

the SO is coming to town next week!
I feel so pathetic getting so emotional about it, but I can't help myself from getting all worked up on the merry-go-round of love.
Fuck It - I say. Fuck It.
I would rather have...
Read More

Had a long walk into the sunset with my mom and her best friend.
Spent the night chatting with them and having some wine from Cannes.

I am SO FUCKING HAPPY to be back in LA.
I am down to 201 lbs and feel GREAT, it is the damned sunshine - I swear it.

Prototype lovelocks delivered today - products look amazing.

Turned down filming...
Read More