koolthing

I have been trying to keep myself as busy as possible, it seems to help keep the blues at bay - or at least keep me from thinking about how fucked I feel when I let my mind wander. Although it makes me happy being in Los Angeles - the sunshine, friends and family, tons of things to explore and re-discover - I keep finding...
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It was a long weekend.
Saturday was consumed trying to move as quickly through hell as possible, but someone kept hitting the damned pause button. We stumbled through the bonfires in the heart of the city of Angels, if the city could be said to have a heart. Trying to enjoy the last few days of LA LA Land and all the amazing things going...
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Saturday mid-morning.
Feeling a bit sketched out.

Chatted with the EX, who is struggling with the realization that we all want her charming, beautiful self. An amusing chat, really - I blogged it in the PSpace for entertainment purposes only...
It was an amazing night filled with unexpected reunions at a loft space in downtown LA. There were rooms of talent desperately looking for something...
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I have been trying to stay so busy there is no time left for the pity party, and it seems to be effective, except at night, you know - when the rest of the world is sleeping...I start spinning...

A quick recap...

The week had a big emotional start - the Ex came down from Santa Barbara to visit, and I spent some desperately needed...
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koolthing paid extra for the camera with a broken lens...
koolthing is convinced that black is the new black...

koolthing got drunk after the AA meeting...

-

lots to tell, no time to tell it.
I owe some pics and posts, tomorrow...

;-)

It is all about love, and the will to happiness.

laptop bettery is almost dead, so I have to post today's entry tonight.
did want to mention a great F2F, finally met CAKEMIX!

have a great day, enjoy the sunshine...

Like a razor, it cuts both ways
I cry when it comes and scream when it goes
nothing in heaven or earth could hope to console me now
"Abandon all hope - ye who enter here"
HA
dante could not have been more wrong
We search through hell, and challenge abominations in search of truth
and find questions we could never hope to answer
always...
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I am desperately trying to spend less time projecting - anticipating, and fantasizing. I have been reading words meant for someone else, and wishing they were meant for me, spending my time in the what if as opposed to the what is. I had to leave some of my writing alone for a bit, because I was feeling uneasy about seeing her today, and wanted...
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Three nights in a row I have had the most vivid dreams about her, the kind of dream that you really aren't sure if you are dreaming, and you can taste, touch, feel, smell... When I woke up this morning, my heart was racing, and I was completely panicked. I feel really creeped out.

I was in a hotel room somewhere in Ohio or Pennsylvania,...
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"Neque porro quisquam est qui dolorem ipsum quia dolor sit amet, consectetur, adipisci velit..."

"There is no one who loves pain itself, who seeks after it and wants to have it, simply because it is pain...."

there are many things to accomplish today.
Corporate ID and website before midnight, and I promised mysellf a nice picnic on the beach.
Glad I work fast...

enjoy the...
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Jet lag has seriously set in, but I needed to make a few notes...

Great day, spoke with the ex, we are going to hook up over the weekend, she sounded like things are coming together for her. I had some really weird dreams about her last night, almost like sensual hallucinations...strange.

I went to my first AA meeting with my friend Janie, and interesting...
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La La Land!
Sipping green tea by the beach in Santa Monica.
The sun is shining, and La La Land is beautiful.

I am off to explore.