kmatt

So I make these posts and I wonder to myself...who am I doing this for. Do people actually read them and find themselves entertained? Bah who gives a fuck I entertain myself and that's what matters!

Anways, here we goooo...

I've been sick for the past wee or so and had to call into work the past two. Problem is my cell phone was dead, and my charger at work. So instead of calling into work sick, I emailed into work sick. Go me.

A girl kissed me today. I think I liked it. It's been to long since I've been kissed. There was this warm fuzzy feeling I got. Probably shoulda told her I had been sick though. Whoops.

The Neverending Story is a great movie. I still have a crush on the child like empress chick. Hopefully that's not to sick and wrong since she was probably like 10.

I was watching some porn that had an asian guy in it. Firm proof that you don't need a large penis to be in porn. Guess I just need to move to Japan now.

Can't thing of anything witty now...so I'll leave you with another story, hooray!

So I was working at a coffee shop, and every Tuesday night a violinist came in for live entertainment. He was an Albanian guy who played violin very well. Anyways, we got to talking one day, and at the time I was homeless, so he made me on offer... He knew of some people that needed citizenship to the U.S. All I needed to do was marry this woman, and stay married for 5 years, and I would get like $25,000 and they would buy me a house we would live in. Thinking back on it, I was 18 at the time and am now 26. I could have done that and been out of there by now. Son of a bitch Oh well, I talked to another Albanian lady who told me it was probably a good idea that I hadn't done that because they probably would have killed me after the 5 years. But still...