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kloiterra

Sperm, originally...

Member Since 2004

Followers 21 Following 32

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Monday Jun 20, 2005

Jun 20, 2005
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day #8 of 13 before a day off...
this sucks.
i feel like a loser, taking this step back to work at mulligan's. no more cuisine, no more saute pans, no more made-from-scratch everything, no more desserts in any kitchen but my own.
sure, i've hated the stress of the country club kitchen for months. sure i miss having any sort of time to have a life. sure, i miss my friends...so why does this feel like such a mistake? is it just the change? is it because i'm exhausted?
then i remind myself that this is just temporary.
one more semester at JCCC and i'll get a chump degree. then i'll move back to lawrence and go back to KU.
mara will be of age soon, right around the time i get off diversion. maybe we'll be together after all... maybe i'll lose her before i ever get to be hers. maybe i'll win the lottery way sooner than i expected and just move to NOLA. maybe i'll get lucky.
just like Brautigan said...too many perhapses in this life.
whee!
devil_bitch:
Breathe. Take your time. Things work out when the time is right for them to do so. I know that sounds like cliche bullshit, but it's true. Hang in there.

Edited for bad spelling.

[Edited on Jun 21, 2005 12:15AM]
Jun 20, 2005

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