kloiterra

what had been going on for the past 8 months is over because she fucked someone else and didn't talk to me about it until after he'd completely fucked her over. it was the only rule of the noncommitment relationship and she broke it. i guess you could call it justice. a bummer, but not a heartbreak.
i feel bad for her. i don't think she deserved to be called "a worthless whore bitch that's only good for sucking dick, and not very good at that." she has pretty low self esteem anyway.
but i don't feel that bad for her. judging from all the drama i saw, i recognized that she is her own enabler-a cycle repeater-and doesn't understand why the physical satisfaction of sex doesn't quench her emotional desire for love. Sarah Silverman said something like "all the dicks in the world won't fill yr heart hole ." yeah she's genuinely sorry, feels like shit and is out $400, while i only lost some companionship and sex. i don't revel in her misery, but i never really trusted her and assumed that she was seeing other people throughout the time we were together. i'm probably the only one who ever treated her with respect--she often said that she didn't deserve me.

also, now that TV broadcasts are all digital, despite having the converter box and an amplified antenna, my TV is worthless. i get nothing.
with no TV,no sex and my new hookup, i'm predicting that most of the summer will be spent in the studio.
shit aint so bad.