To say that SG has change my life, is an understatement. I've never been "accepted" as I am here. I've always been the oddball in every situation. Still am. But here it's accepted, ten fold.
For some people I've never physically met, as lame as it is, I consider you some of my closest friends. You've seen me in my skivvies for Christs sake!!!!! One in particular. I've met someone who I have such strong feelings for. He's amazing in every sense of the word, and I'm honoured that he even considers me as a "phone contact." I've been dependent on him, and that's not fair, but he allows it, embraces it. I'm gushing thinking about it! He is definitely one of my closest friends, a million miles apart.
For anyone who has made contact with my by SG or other forms of communication, you know I'm a flirt. I guess being the geeky, overweight, loser, you never EVER got the attention you needed to feel confident in life. This could all be in my mind, but I've never felt "wanted" by a man (other than my current bf), for who I am. Yes, I've been with guys but they totally wanted me for all the wrong reasons. I've literally been used and abused, So getting this random attention now, I'm absorbing it until it dries up, so to speak. The fact that you people are "virtual", I feel safer knowing I won't be physically hurt, again. Mentally is a different story.
I don't mean to "lead people on", I'm just being me. This past weekend has been a clusterfuck of emotions because of some revelations.
The past has come to haunt me, and it's freaking me the fuck out.
Wow this has to be the lamest, most confusing blog.
I leave you with a pic of my Monday blues. Face, only a mudder could love!
