killthehostage

so low that i wish i was dead with a knife in my chest and a bullet in my head.

man....

i'm not sure how much more bummed a guy could get recently. for whatever reason my ex called me lastnight all plastered and kept hanging up....

eventually i got a hold of her, and she kept me on the phone saying that she was all depressed and this and that, and i tried my best to help. it just sucks when someone's so uncosolable.

then she told me why she was sad, and it involved a married man, and how she was "upset he wouldn't leave his wife". needless to say i was floored. i mean, i guess i have no right to feel bad, it's her life and i guess i'm not a part of that, but she could've at least told me before we were intimate on a couple occasions. it makes me feel slightly ill even now, but i think i'm feeling better than the icy-deadness-inside i felt lastnight on the phone.

life sucks so make the worst of it. . oh well, i gotta get ready for work.