So, blogging.
Let's see how that goes, shall we.
Well, it's not really something I've done before, and well, my life needs a change.
Tomorrow, is Mothers Day.
And apparently, my mother thought it would be okay to organize a lunch with my family for it. In a normal family (if they even exist any more) that would be okay, however she thought it would be fine to bring her abusive husband with her.
The man that used to scream every bad thing I thought about myself at me, from the age of about 10 until I got old enough to either stay out until I knew Mum would be home from work, or actually stand up for myself. Which is something she refuses to accept happened/was as bad as it was, 'because if it was really that bad, you would have told me about it'.
The thing is, I don't know how to let go of the fact that she is still with him, and chose him over me. But what is even worse, is I don't know how to tell her. When shit like this happens, I get upset, angry and hurt all over again by it, but when I'm with her, it all kinda melts away, because I do love my mum, and I don't want to be angry and hurt.
Well, that's enough word vomit for the now.
We'll see how things go tomorrow, because that's the only choice I've got.
Let's see how that goes, shall we.
Well, it's not really something I've done before, and well, my life needs a change.
Tomorrow, is Mothers Day.
And apparently, my mother thought it would be okay to organize a lunch with my family for it. In a normal family (if they even exist any more) that would be okay, however she thought it would be fine to bring her abusive husband with her.
The man that used to scream every bad thing I thought about myself at me, from the age of about 10 until I got old enough to either stay out until I knew Mum would be home from work, or actually stand up for myself. Which is something she refuses to accept happened/was as bad as it was, 'because if it was really that bad, you would have told me about it'.
The thing is, I don't know how to let go of the fact that she is still with him, and chose him over me. But what is even worse, is I don't know how to tell her. When shit like this happens, I get upset, angry and hurt all over again by it, but when I'm with her, it all kinda melts away, because I do love my mum, and I don't want to be angry and hurt.
Well, that's enough word vomit for the now.
We'll see how things go tomorrow, because that's the only choice I've got.
the internet gives a sense of anonymity to what you say, while still helping to provide a safety net of people you can meet and interact with who can help bring you out of the dark at times with a kind word of encouragement, make you laugh with a silly story when you're sad, or just help pass the time when you're bored as hell.
good luck tomorrow, and you should probably get that word vomit thing looked at, hopefully it's not to serious.