The Adventures of Kerberos in the Land of Writers Block
"Hello brick wall!" I say, excited to see it in front of me.
"Hello, Kerberos. Ive been expecting you for quite some time", it says to me. An evil lilt in its voice, a glint of steel in its eye. "As a matter of fact, you're very, very late."
"Im here to update my journal, Ive got some great ideas and I want to share them with the SG world!"
Silence fills the air, heavy silence pressing me back and down to the hard packed earth.
"Do you know why Im here?" Bricky says to me, slicing through the oppression, cutting into my head. "Im here to stop you. No writing for you today and no writing for you for quite some time"
I stutter, "Im...uh...well....huh?" completely at a loss of words now. "But I have hot fudge!"
"Hot fudge you say? Bricky show's some interest in hot fudge. I think to myself that I might have finally found a way through. Well since you have hot fudge, why dont you just come on through.
Really? Im eager to get these remaining thoughts out on to the internet before they all leak out of the fresh gash Bricky left in my head from its last statement.
NO! Not really you impudent fool! When was the last time you actually had some story or awesome thought in your head you wanted to get out? Who was there to help you in those times of stupidity?
Fresh gravel spittle lands in my eyes, now Im blind and slowly loosing my thoughts.
You dumb bastard! I yell. They are my thoughts, my stories and you cant stop me! Ill just go around and find another way through
Whos the dumb bastard now? it questions me. Something in its voice raises my nerves to an orange terror level. While you were offering me the hot fudge, I closed the gap from whence you came and no you are surrounded by ME! SUPREME WRITERS BLOCK!
I spin around on my heels to verify the facts; yes indeed Im surrounded now. Now way out except up, very high up.
Asshole is the only word that comes out of my dead dry mouth as I slump to the ground, my back against the surrounding brick wall. Im stuck for sure now.
While you are sitting there wasting away, it says to me with greed in its voice now, do you think I could have that hot fudge? I love me some hot fudge.
"Hello brick wall!" I say, excited to see it in front of me.
"Hello, Kerberos. Ive been expecting you for quite some time", it says to me. An evil lilt in its voice, a glint of steel in its eye. "As a matter of fact, you're very, very late."
"Im here to update my journal, Ive got some great ideas and I want to share them with the SG world!"
Silence fills the air, heavy silence pressing me back and down to the hard packed earth.
"Do you know why Im here?" Bricky says to me, slicing through the oppression, cutting into my head. "Im here to stop you. No writing for you today and no writing for you for quite some time"
I stutter, "Im...uh...well....huh?" completely at a loss of words now. "But I have hot fudge!"
"Hot fudge you say? Bricky show's some interest in hot fudge. I think to myself that I might have finally found a way through. Well since you have hot fudge, why dont you just come on through.
Really? Im eager to get these remaining thoughts out on to the internet before they all leak out of the fresh gash Bricky left in my head from its last statement.
NO! Not really you impudent fool! When was the last time you actually had some story or awesome thought in your head you wanted to get out? Who was there to help you in those times of stupidity?
Fresh gravel spittle lands in my eyes, now Im blind and slowly loosing my thoughts.
You dumb bastard! I yell. They are my thoughts, my stories and you cant stop me! Ill just go around and find another way through
Whos the dumb bastard now? it questions me. Something in its voice raises my nerves to an orange terror level. While you were offering me the hot fudge, I closed the gap from whence you came and no you are surrounded by ME! SUPREME WRITERS BLOCK!
I spin around on my heels to verify the facts; yes indeed Im surrounded now. Now way out except up, very high up.
Asshole is the only word that comes out of my dead dry mouth as I slump to the ground, my back against the surrounding brick wall. Im stuck for sure now.
While you are sitting there wasting away, it says to me with greed in its voice now, do you think I could have that hot fudge? I love me some hot fudge.
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
That's fucking classic. I'm going to update my journal with that header. I'll give you credit don't worry.
xip