kelsie

Well, yet another friend has killed himself. That makes three guys, all 21 (my age), all suicides in less than six months. It's getting pretty ridiculous...it's just hard for me to buy that they couldn't face life anymore. I hate to sound like a bitch when talking about my recently deceased friends, but it's getting old. With the first one, Ric, we all knew something wasn't right, that he would never do that, but they refused to investigate further. I know he got ahold of something bad, but they never determined what it was so will always be a tragic mystery. But Drew and John, the most recent two, both lived in their parent's basement, worked when they felt like it, and used their ex-girlfriends for a reason to drink themselves into oblivion every single night. Their families and friends tried to help, and now all they can do is wonder if there's something they could have done. Well, I'm not wondering anymore. John was there with me when we found out about Ricardo just in November--he even went and got a "Ricco" tattoo in his memory. To know that he saw what everyone felt over that and STILL decided he would take a gun to his head in his parent's basement...I just don't even know how to feel sorry over that. It's fucking selfish. I cried for about 30 seconds before I realized I was just too pissed to cry.

Just another reason not to grow up in a small town. Everyone eventually kills themselves when all there is to do is drugs.