Having two jobs is physically and emotionally challenging, and I am contemplating quitting one at the end of the Holiday season. Mostly because of one of said workplaces, being privately-owned, is in the hole and we have received no bonuses AND they just dropped our insurance (we can keep it if we want to pay 150/mo out of our paychecks, which is more than I spend on my medical bills in TWO months). And the drama, the fucking drama. There is a girl there who genuinely, unabashedly, passionately hates my guts. Why? Not completely sure, but I have a feeling it is because I was up for a promotion that she wanted (which they still have yet to fill) and, according to rumor, I "remind her of a girl that bullied her in high school." There are a minute number of people who have bullied me in my life, and this sad girl is one of them.
Every. Single. Day. that I work at this job, I want to quit. For a Medical Industry job, there is a LOT of patient neglect and unprofessional-ism and I am ashamed to associate myself with this place. There was a moment of weakness when I was out and inebriated with some fellow ladies from work, and the conversation tipped toward She-who-shall-not-be-named. The other ladies were making fun of her unattractive features and I openly expressed my dislike of her petty issues with me. My darling friend laughed, passed me a shot, and we all made a toast:
"Here is to being prettier than the people that hate us!"
For those of you who have met me, I am generally a quiet little thing and despise conflict. Helping people smile makes me the happiest. But it is entirely too easy to hold onto hate, isn't it? I don't have time or energy to gossip. If a 'friend' gossips to me about another friend, my first thought is always that I am a topic of their conversation when I am not around. Don't trust a Gossip, my friends. I hate who I am when angry.
My therapy for anger is listening to Metal, playing video games (just got a PS4), and causing myself some form of pain or another. Due to recent stress:
My girl friend and I went out and got Pokemon tattoos. This will start off my hip/leg sleeve project involving Amaterasu, Mushi, Kodama, etc.
Granted, I do feel better, but I have to make this horrid decision to leave now, or stay at BOTH jobs so that I have the extra money. For now, I will duke it out and keep my health and happiness always at heart. Also, my cheesy sort of love for the Yule season.
