kellymonster

Kelly blogs at work...

Never mind the copious amounts of SGs being zotted, let's focus on the more important things happening in the world.

This blog will serve no purpose other than for me to have a big fucking moan. I am so sick of my job. I am sick of having to hold the hands of incompetent users whilst leading them through the simplest of trouble shooting exercises. I am sick of people expecting me to have all of the answers when questioned about things that are clearly shrouded in corporate political bullshit. I am sick of speaking to miserable people all day because, let's face it, the only reason anyone ever calls is because something has gone wrong. Just call me your IT agony aunt. And while we're at it, no, I do not know why your account has locked out again. MAYBE OF YOU DIDN'T TYPE THE WRONG FUCKING PASSWORD THREE TIMES THEN WE WOULDN'T BE HAVING THIS CONVERSATION.

And breathe.

Thank you for allowing me shout. It is a rare occurrence. I know I only have 5 working days left at this facist cunt of a company but I feel like my brain could explode before then. Today an email was sent out about how we must support our new colleagues in Budapest (AKA the unfortunate ones who are taking over our jobs):

"I think it goes without saying, but if anyone calls up and asks about the Service Desk in Budapest, the feedback to give is that the implementation has gone very well and the customers we've spoken to have been extremely positive about the Service being provided."

Basically Mr. Controlling and Oppressive Manager, you want me to lie, because the truth is they are just extra hands for us to hold, extra voices for us to lead through the seemingly confusing path that is Information Technology. They clearly do not understand the language which means they are unaware of the processes so we pick up the pieces. They do have a sense of humour though, today one of the incident titles read 'i snot' rather than 'is not'. Actually, maybe that's just me making a childish mockery of an honest typo. Fuck it, I still think it's funny.

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to drink a coffee from the lovely machine which spits out a substance that fizzes with a sound I can only imagine is similar to that of caustic soda on rotting flesh. Or Lime-Lite on your draining board...