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kadium:
Very true.
I hope you enjoy the festival.
I hope you enjoy the festival.
catdad:
Like the new profile pic. 
The year is comin' 'round. I can't really say it's bittersweet, because it's far more bitter than sweet. I woke up this afternoon, and I did get teary in the midst of my always-therapeutic phone conversation with Carrie. Let's pretend that disappointment never happens so that we can earnestly surrender ourselves to deep compassion and love without the fear that our efforts will, some day,...
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tangledupinblue:
I don't think we need to pretend that disappointment never happens. I think it's about affirming in one's heart that the rewards of love always outweigh the risks of hurt.
I don't know that there is much here to live for without love, in all its forms. It doesn't mean that it is easy to find, or maintainable without heartbreak sometimes. But it's a way of life to commit to -- to live with an open heart -- that's better than the alternative.
Not opening up may seem safe, but it's internal suicide of degrees, and I think it is more painful than people actually contemplate. Loneliness on a deep and personal level is its own heartbreak. It's antecedent cause is less specific, but that's not much comfort at 3am when you feel like the world has locked you out and the night's turned cold.
I never get the fears of being hurt as a reason to not try -- I'd never own dogs under that logic. My cocker spaniel dying was agony, but I still got Fidel and Esperanza, even though I know I am going to have to go through their eventual deaths. But in a mortal and imperfect world, there's just no way to isolate yourself from pain, even by disengaging.
Anyway, I hope you find the key to put your happiness primarily within your own grasp. If someone leaves you, and hurts you and behaves badly, to be honest, they aren't worth the salt in your tears.
Take it easy
I don't know that there is much here to live for without love, in all its forms. It doesn't mean that it is easy to find, or maintainable without heartbreak sometimes. But it's a way of life to commit to -- to live with an open heart -- that's better than the alternative.
Not opening up may seem safe, but it's internal suicide of degrees, and I think it is more painful than people actually contemplate. Loneliness on a deep and personal level is its own heartbreak. It's antecedent cause is less specific, but that's not much comfort at 3am when you feel like the world has locked you out and the night's turned cold.
I never get the fears of being hurt as a reason to not try -- I'd never own dogs under that logic. My cocker spaniel dying was agony, but I still got Fidel and Esperanza, even though I know I am going to have to go through their eventual deaths. But in a mortal and imperfect world, there's just no way to isolate yourself from pain, even by disengaging.
Anyway, I hope you find the key to put your happiness primarily within your own grasp. If someone leaves you, and hurts you and behaves badly, to be honest, they aren't worth the salt in your tears.
Take it easy
cassiel:
♥
you're a really cool, really interesting person, and I'm glad we're friends.
♥
you're a really cool, really interesting person, and I'm glad we're friends.
♥
I haven't quite decided how I feel about this yet.
"There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these lovable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of...
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"There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these lovable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
argentumblack:
Give it time dear and some guy will have nice things to say about you.
you're amazing...some guy will come along and realize that.
someone prolly already has...recognizing who it is...is always the hardest part.
♥
Arg
you're amazing...some guy will come along and realize that.
someone prolly already has...recognizing who it is...is always the hardest part.
♥
Arg
tangledupinblue:
Nope -- still don't believe that quote!
But that's not why I'm here.
Dude -- I had no idea our boys had a new album in the works.
I'm very, very excited for 3/3 -- every time u2 has an album out, it signals a huge period of transition in my life. I am so excited and wondering what life is ready to deal me this spring.
Oh, wow, I don't remember the last time I've been so all wound up for a new album.
Only time since Atomic Bomb was Dylan's last album.
Oh wow.
so ready for a tour too
I'm positively GIDDY
But that's not why I'm here.
Dude -- I had no idea our boys had a new album in the works.
I'm very, very excited for 3/3 -- every time u2 has an album out, it signals a huge period of transition in my life. I am so excited and wondering what life is ready to deal me this spring.
Oh, wow, I don't remember the last time I've been so all wound up for a new album.
Only time since Atomic Bomb was Dylan's last album.
Oh wow.
so ready for a tour too
I'm positively GIDDY
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tangus:
you = tall girl!!
cassiel:
on the NIN website, he's promised us a (belated) holiday present...methinks it might be a new album
It kills me to go back and read 90% of what I've written in my journal here. I always think I know best. I think I'm so damn smart. So ahead of the curve.
I know that I'm not. I'm not. I'm just Erica, shrugging my shoulders all the time.
Most of these entries are treacherous to read. Don't go back. Don't read them. You...
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I know that I'm not. I'm not. I'm just Erica, shrugging my shoulders all the time.
Most of these entries are treacherous to read. Don't go back. Don't read them. You...
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kadium:
Thank you for the kind words. Hope you're enjoying your New Year's Eve and have a wonderful year to follow.
maxwelldemon:
Your right we all record happenings in our lifes in different ways. Your far too hard on yourself. Life is about forgiving yourself and moving on. You need to give yourself more praise because you've come along way. Happy New Years.
When I make little changes to my profile, I get excited.
Is that lame?
I have two new celebrity crushes: Mos Def and Mark Ruffalo.
I am suppose to be watching a movie.
I really have to go to the bathroom.
I had a nice Christmas, by the way. It was modest, but very sentimental. I love my family.
Leave a comment with your thoughts...
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Is that lame?
I have two new celebrity crushes: Mos Def and Mark Ruffalo.
I am suppose to be watching a movie.
I really have to go to the bathroom.
I had a nice Christmas, by the way. It was modest, but very sentimental. I love my family.
Leave a comment with your thoughts...
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cassiel:
what movie? also, Sprite. because it is classic.
rickroyal:
I used to enjoy a lime flavored soda that is no longer produced. It tasted like a lime slushy but was a carbonated liquid. For the life of me, I cannot remember the name.
Alas, Mos Def was unable to capture Ford Prefect, thus I cannot crush on him. Ruffalo? Yes, that one I perfectly understand.
Alas, Mos Def was unable to capture Ford Prefect, thus I cannot crush on him. Ruffalo? Yes, that one I perfectly understand.
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tangledupinblue:
It's funny, I was just wondering whether or not to renew my membership in February. I sure feel less involved with the site, my lady who I met on here hardly ever has the time to log on here. and I go through long periods of being quiet in my journal (the byproduct of happiness, I think, actually),
But, along with a couple of other people, it would be worth it be on here just to see how you are getting on. I reckon that you and I have been SG friends since nearly the time you joined -- brought together in friendship by Bono and the u2 group -- and I've enjoyed your journal writing as much as anything on here. So, I hope you stick around.
I love reading your stuff, and, maybe more than that, if I have something that feels important to write about in my journal, I always look forward to hearing your views on what I'm saying. It's very cool to have people whose opinion you truly respect able to access your thoughts and opine on them, and your opinion is one that I very much respect.
Merry Christmas -- and try stouffers french bread pizza, I just made some, and if I needed to gain weight I'd probably keep that and a plate of gnocchi nearby all the time!
But, along with a couple of other people, it would be worth it be on here just to see how you are getting on. I reckon that you and I have been SG friends since nearly the time you joined -- brought together in friendship by Bono and the u2 group -- and I've enjoyed your journal writing as much as anything on here. So, I hope you stick around.
I love reading your stuff, and, maybe more than that, if I have something that feels important to write about in my journal, I always look forward to hearing your views on what I'm saying. It's very cool to have people whose opinion you truly respect able to access your thoughts and opine on them, and your opinion is one that I very much respect.
Merry Christmas -- and try stouffers french bread pizza, I just made some, and if I needed to gain weight I'd probably keep that and a plate of gnocchi nearby all the time!
maxwelldemon:
Greetings,
Merry Christmas to you. Sounds like your Cave poster is of the single off of Murder Balleds. I believe the track is "Henry Lee". By far Dig Lazerus Dig is album of the year for me. I look forward to reading what your top picks are. I remember we were both huge fans of Mr. Clayton. I'm glad they told Rubin where to shove it. His work hasn't been so good lately. Have you picked up the Eno/Byrne cd? Well, hope all is well & you need to remember when things are looking grey that in a few months the U2 cd will be out.
Merry Christmas to you. Sounds like your Cave poster is of the single off of Murder Balleds. I believe the track is "Henry Lee". By far Dig Lazerus Dig is album of the year for me. I look forward to reading what your top picks are. I remember we were both huge fans of Mr. Clayton. I'm glad they told Rubin where to shove it. His work hasn't been so good lately. Have you picked up the Eno/Byrne cd? Well, hope all is well & you need to remember when things are looking grey that in a few months the U2 cd will be out.
It is so strange to read my last blog. My head was in a different place in late October and then, as the Morrissey song goes, November spawned a monster in me. December seems to be heading in a better direction, but, then again, it's only the 4th. I'll remain optimistic. The holidays are sort of bittersweet, I suppose. I should maybe hold off on...
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cassiel:
♥
tangledupinblue:
most excellent portfolio!
http://www.ohio.edu/outlook/08-09/October/99.cfm
Today, Lianne's (or Elsie's) mom called me. I was not expecting it, but I was very glad that she contacted me. We talked about Lianne and her passing and what a blessing Lianne was to the world. I am going to give her some prints from our photo shoot in September. I am so honored to be able to do this. Lianne's mom...
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Today, Lianne's (or Elsie's) mom called me. I was not expecting it, but I was very glad that she contacted me. We talked about Lianne and her passing and what a blessing Lianne was to the world. I am going to give her some prints from our photo shoot in September. I am so honored to be able to do this. Lianne's mom...
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infinity:
I've got my facebook profile to friends only so that helps a bit, but not totally. The whole thing started waayyy before I even could have put the SG page on my profile anyway.
It's not so much that people know I'm a fan of the site that's the issue since I really don't care about my classmates knowing that. Just the fact that people are judging me from it without at least taking a few seconds to wither go on the site or go into wikipedia and look it up. Bah. Though I'm probably better off without those kinds of people in my life.
Though the whole thing has me wondering what will I end up doing should something like that happen again later in life - I really don't want SG mixing with my professional life. It's something that I will have to wait and see what happens.
It's not so much that people know I'm a fan of the site that's the issue since I really don't care about my classmates knowing that. Just the fact that people are judging me from it without at least taking a few seconds to wither go on the site or go into wikipedia and look it up. Bah. Though I'm probably better off without those kinds of people in my life.
Though the whole thing has me wondering what will I end up doing should something like that happen again later in life - I really don't want SG mixing with my professional life. It's something that I will have to wait and see what happens.
someoneuk:
Sorry to hear about Lianne, glad you got the call from her mum.
Good luck with the internship, and erm, the election!
btw, your Flickr pictures are awesome great colours, and contrasts in all the portraits - I only ever seem to take landscapes, and people in any of mine, more than often look like they have stepped into the photo like a deer in the headlights.
Good luck with the internship, and erm, the election!
btw, your Flickr pictures are awesome great colours, and contrasts in all the portraits - I only ever seem to take landscapes, and people in any of mine, more than often look like they have stepped into the photo like a deer in the headlights.
I've been told to not read Revolutionary Road.
I'm sensitive.