kelland

Now my heart is full.

Today is Morrissey's birthday. Celebrate by passing on meat and sulking the night away in the bathtub with a fine class of wine.

Man oh man oh man. I haven't updated in awhile. But I have good news. As of the 17th, I am a licensed driver. And although I don't exactly have my own car, I have been driving by myself quite a bit. To and from work. With and without friends. It is something that gives me great pride. That and the fact that school is out in a week.

That means no more fucking chemistry. I took my last test in that class Friday. It was a group test and I was the captain of my group. That too was a good feeling. No more Spanish. I admit I am going to miss it, but this year hasn't been that much fun for me. It's partially because my teacher is a flakey, moody, lazy coffee-addict. There was a time when I thought the world of him, but recently, he shows me very little.

This summer, I think I am going to take up reading again. I have piss poor reading comprehension and this bothers me. Help me out by leaving a comment about your favorite book, or a book you would recommend to me. I like controversial, sexy, thrilling, and somewhat disturbing material. No history, please. And nothing about the struggle and oppression of women.

I also think that this summer I am going to go for more walks.

I also also think that this summer I am going to get a tattoo.

I also also also think that this summer I am going to start saving my money more efficiently.

I want to save to go on a trip to Europe next summer.

I want to spend more time with you.

I am starting to re-examine my various relationships. I have begun asking myself why I have chosen certain people to be my friends, and how important they really are in the grand scheme of things. I have concluded that I have very, very few real friends. Very few people I feel comfortable around in any scenario. And probably only one that I see myself with long-term. This past Friday, I experienced a social disaster: three of my friends (each of which I know on completely different levels and none of which have spent time with any of my other friends) thrown into one big awkward, uncomfortable evening. I felt terrible afterwards. And then I realized that I may have too many facets to my personality to constantly fulfill. Maybe that is why I always feel unsatisfied. Unhappy. Numb. Maybe I need a little social stability. Maybe I need one person and that's it.

I have to go to work in fifteen minutes. It's fine but I'm a little tired of constantly smelling like pizza and pizza-esque products intermixed with perfume and the smell of a straightening iron.

P.S. I forgot to mention the fact that my dad, after nine months of unemployment, got a job, and he sold his first home earlier this week. Also, my sister might need surgery. And my good friend Sara broke up with her boyfriend Seth. That's the low-down.