Stopping. Not to smell the flowers. Not to taste the malice or the bitterness of reality. I only wish to freeze this moment so I can look at it later and laugh an awkward laugh and smile a sore smile. I wish that I wanted to walk out the door and feel no need to look back. But there's the friend on the telephone winning over my attention, and there's the boy at school who drives past my house when I'm not even home. A person is flagging me down and the jog towards their plea is never ending. I know that you don't deserve better because I gave everything I had and I never gained a damn thing. When I look at you I see a friend unmoved, unchanged... And if I had the patience to feel sorry or regretful, I wouldn't because there's work to be done and labor leaves no room for remorse. Tomorrow is another attempt to improve, and I simply do not have the energy to be anything more than numb. You can just stay right where you are, right where I left you.
My eyes are closing. My fingers are lazily tapping at the keys. Drowsiness. And the relentless pace of homework on top of homework on top of a shitty day on top of responsibility overload on top of crying in a bathroom stall on top of conversations that I wish I'd never had. I haven't had time to eat, and even if I did, I don't think I would. As of late my stomach has turned into this pit of undying anxiety and nausea. I need to sleep. I need to relax. I need a good song and a good hug and a good friend. I need a good dream to get my through this night, and tomorrow when I wake up, I need something great to remind me why I'm getting up at all. I should stop listening to slow, dry, tear-inducing music now.
Everyone go and wish my good friend and coffeehouse slash drugstore companion truextilxdeath a happy birthday. Tell him that Kelland, a supercool and superneato female sent you. He will then say, "Yes, Kelland is the awesomest of the awesome." And the trend of compliments will continue as such.
I'm sorry these posts are fucking sad. I'm sad. If you want to read something happy, go two posts back and read about pizza and thrift stores.
Sing me to sleep... and then leave me alone.
My eyes are closing. My fingers are lazily tapping at the keys. Drowsiness. And the relentless pace of homework on top of homework on top of a shitty day on top of responsibility overload on top of crying in a bathroom stall on top of conversations that I wish I'd never had. I haven't had time to eat, and even if I did, I don't think I would. As of late my stomach has turned into this pit of undying anxiety and nausea. I need to sleep. I need to relax. I need a good song and a good hug and a good friend. I need a good dream to get my through this night, and tomorrow when I wake up, I need something great to remind me why I'm getting up at all. I should stop listening to slow, dry, tear-inducing music now.
Everyone go and wish my good friend and coffeehouse slash drugstore companion truextilxdeath a happy birthday. Tell him that Kelland, a supercool and superneato female sent you. He will then say, "Yes, Kelland is the awesomest of the awesome." And the trend of compliments will continue as such.
I'm sorry these posts are fucking sad. I'm sad. If you want to read something happy, go two posts back and read about pizza and thrift stores.
Sing me to sleep... and then leave me alone.
VIEW 25 of 33 COMMENTS
and we've talked about this before, you can't snuggle me to death, because i'll be dead, and you'll be in jail
thank you for liking the picture
hope you're doing better today miss kelland. i keep seeing someone who looks like you, who walks past the shop every day. it makes me smile
take care....
I'm glad to see I dodged a bullet (or a saw), I guess. I think scary movies these days are incredibly formulaic - the flashing sights, the loud sounds - but it all boils down to no plot. I'll rent it some time perhaps.
Have a great Sunday.
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