kelland

We thought we had everything we wanted as we traded in our valuables and trashed all our earnings. We scratched our names from the dotted lines, erased our identities, emptied our accounts... and started fresh, out into the world without support for the very first time. A brand new slate for two brand new people. But as bliss often leads to ignorance and ignorance often leads to loneliness, our knees buckled and we collapsed. We gave in to the pressures, and now we see ourselves destructing again and falling again and failing to smile again. I see you in passing and you see that I'm not the person I was -- I'm worse. I see that you no longer look happy or refreshed or unattached - youre miserable. And now, like two weakened souls exhausted of their means, we find each other and pour our hearts out on the spot. And we realize were exactly where we started two strangers finding the time to become friends and discover what life feels like when youre not going at it alone... and it feels good to me.

T'was a ralaxing weekend. I spent some quality time with my sister, which was needed. Yesterday I drove her and my mom to run errands and we grabbed some lunch at the local coffee shop. I managed to purchase all of the items mentioned in my previous post minus the picture frames, but while in Wal*mart, I realized how badly I want a new throw rug for my room and a new lampshade. So with my first paycheck, which I will not receive until friggin' November 1st, I will purchase these items, and I will feel fulfilled in life. Granted, my mom bought all the things I needed last night because I am, alas, broke at the moment. Actually, I've been broke for over a month now... ever since I bought tickets for Ani and Interpol. Speaking of Interpol, I got the new ablum last night! It is terriff. I suggest you all go out and buy that sucker right away.

I finally updated my Trent Reznor fanlisting. There were new member submissions dated all the way back to February... and I had to sort through about 180 e-mails. Needless to say, I feel very productive right now.

Shannon and I went on one of our good ol' long drives in the country at around 9:30 last night. It was dark and deserted and the air was chilly and we blasted What's the Story, Morning Glory? by Oasis. For those 30 minutes together, with nothing but ourselves and the road, we felt infinite.

October
And the trees are stripped bare
Of all they wear
What do I care
October
And kingdoms rise
And kingdoms fall
But you go on... and on...
- U2.