kelland

For once, I have a few things to write about.

One of them is DECA. Remember what DECA is? Organization of business/marketing students? I am involved in it through my Media Communications class? My partner is named Andi and we were in the Financial Analysis category together? Anything ringing a bell? OK. Well, so anyways, even if it isn't. This past weekend was the state DECA competition. Everyone who qualified for state traveled down to Columbus for Friday and Saturday. We stayed at this fancy hotel/convocation center/mini mall/airport-sized palace in the arena district. Went to the mall. Went out to eat. Went to a dance. Went to a lot of stupid-ass ceremonies. Had a nice hotel room. It was fun, fun times. I know it sounds a little lame, but I had a blast. Andi and I made it to the finals in our category, or top 10, but we didn't make top five so we don't get to compete nationally.

Not that you can tell, but I've been gaining weight lately. Probably around... six... seven... eight pounds. I am not exactly sure because I've been neglecting any confrontation with a scale. I feel pretty blah about it. For some reason, I am just constantly hungry. This puzzles me. I have this persistent starved feeling. Maybe I have a tapeworm. But then wouldn't I be losing weight? What the fuck.

I received a $1000 scholarship today. I was very happy about that. I have been filling those bitches out like crazy and it's about time I got a response. Congratulations, eh?

Today was a good day. I felt relieved. Psychology is over. We covered interesting material in that class, but unfortunately, the instructor wasn't so interesting, and I slept 90% of the time. I feel like I really didn't get anything out of it, and in the end, that makes me sad. But I digress.

I am also relieved because I finished yet another scholarship I've been working on, and I managed to finish my art term paper that's due tomorrow. Achievement makes me fuzzy inside.

For this entire week, I have a three and half hour delay because the freshman and sophomores are taking the Ohio Graduation Test in the morning. Going to school at 11:00 A.M. is seriously awesome. I love it. This morning, Jessica and I went out to breakfast together, and it was lovely. I want to do that everyday.

When can I look through the glass again, and see my reflection unfazed again, and understand the circumstances again? When will I see a solution at the doorstep? And when, just tell me, will you remember to remember that I'm still forgotten? I'm still waiting on the porch with a wilting bouquet of explanation and you say, "Leave it on the step." Looking forward to you showing up, but showing up late, or calling, but calling out of obligation... I can't have that anymore. Those things on the shelf are getting dusty and rotten with redundancy, and I've run right out of meaning, and I've run right out in front of parked cars. The wind is going to take you to a place and take me somewhere else completely. Sing this song loudly and remember what it used to evoke. Sit on the porch and pick at the wilted flowers and dial up an excuse and understand that an answer is three hours away. Race me in the parking lot to win a place in the front seat, and you're not gonna sit there anymore, sleeping with your arms out the window. I won't be in the back leaning forward to smell your hair and laugh at stupid shit. I bring you a package of guilt and you say, "Leave it on the step." But I'm not re-emerging from this hole like I did before on a weekly basis. I can't have that anymore. When can I look through this fog again, and see my enemy transformed into my best friend, and my best friend transformed into a complete stranger?