kelland

I'm losing my faith in you. You don't want it to be true. But there's nothing you can do. There is nothing you can do. Yes, I've lost my faith in you.

Eradicate my anger. Please. It's not all there anymore. I got an apology. I broke down some barriers and gave an apology as well. And got a hug. And a few lingering glances and grins and smiles and playful remarks and a "call me sometime" as I walked out the door to my car.

I'm waiting for your touch. And I will carve your sweet 666 in my heart.



The weather has been cold lately. I have a feeling it will be consistently cold from now on. That makes me happy because I love autumn, and five months of hot, sticky summer is simply too much. I like dressing in layers and drinking hot tea and cuddling in bed and picking the wet earthy-colored leaves from the bottom of my shoe. Summer doesn't offer me anything but a window for laziness and dormancy. I hate those things.

H.I.M. is a good band to listen to when the weather gets cooler.

Other good musical selections:
- The Smiths: Hatful of Hollow
- Elliott Smith: Either/Or
- U2: The Unforgettable Fire
- Placebo: Sleeping with Ghosts
- INXS: Full Moon, Dirty Hearts
- Muse: The Origin of Symmetry
- Depeche Mode: A Broken Frame
- Smashing Pumpkins: Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness

Those albums all remind me of autumn. Maybe they won't for you. But it's worth a try.

My weekend was nice. Friday was a good day. I went out for coffee with my friend Cati and then had a nice night at work and then went out to Tegan's sister's house after work to watch a movie with Sara, Shay, and Tegan's man Matthew. But Matt invited these dorkwads from police school (or whatever) to mingle with us single ladies, Shay in particular, and they were complete idiots. They were there until two in the morning, and after they left, we were up until four talking about how ridiculous they were. I left at eight and went home because I was too cold sleeping on Tegan's sister's floor. Saturday was a good day. Nevin and I went thrift shopping, and he kindly purchased some nifty items for me, and I kindly picked out several garments for his wearing pleasure. I didn't want him to buy me anything, but he insisted. I suppose I did purchase the gas that got us there. I suppose it was a fair trade. Then I went to work and My-uh was a real sweetheart to me and that made me happy. Kati and Jessica and Kayleigh visited me and showered me with hugs and that also made me quite delighted. Today was a good day. I got a lot of my homework and various other tasks done. Rather productive.

So that is that.

I wish I didn't have to squander the contents of my next paycheck. But I must. I have 400 things to pay for and only about 200 dollars to pay for these 400 things. I'm no mathematician, but that just doesn't work out right.

Please tell me that I'm heading in the right direction.