"...this abortion issue in the States is dividing the country right in half. You know, and even amongst my friends - we're all highly intelligent - they're totally divided on the issue of abortion. Totally divided. Some of my friends think these pro-life people are just annoying idiots. Other of my friends think these pro-life people are evil fucks. How are we gonna have a consensus? I'm torn. I try and take the broad view and think of them as evil, annoying, idiot fucks." ~ Bill Hicks
"Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception til' nine months, after that they don't want to know about you, they don't want to hear from you, know nothin'. No neo-natal care, no daycare, no headstart, no school lunch, no food stamps, no nothin'. If you're pre-born, you're fine, if you're pre-school you're fucked. Conservatives don't give a damn about you until you reach military age. Then they think you're just fine, just what they've been looking for. Conservatives want live babies, so they can raise 'em to be dead soldiers." ~ George Carlin
"If you're so pro-life, and you're so pro-child, then adopt one that's already here, and is very unwanted, and very alone, and needs someone to take care of it and get it out of a horrible situation. And people say 'Well, why don't you do that?' and I say 'Cause I hate fucking kids and couldn't care less'." ~ Bill Hicks
----
Bill Hicks: You know who s really bugging me these days. These pro-lifers ...
Smattering of applause.
Bill: You ever look at their faces? "I'm pro-life!"
(Bill makes a pinched face of hate and fear, his lips are pursed as though he's just sucked on a lemon.)
Bill: "I'm pro-life!" Boy, they look it don't they? They just exude joie de vie. You just want to hang with them and play Trivial Pursuit all night long.
Audience chuckles.
Bill: You know what bugs me about them? If you're so pro-life, do me a favour - don't lock arms and block medical clinics. If you're so pro-life, lock arms and block cemetaries.
Audience laughs.
Bill: Let's see how committed you are to this idea.
(Bill mimes the pursed lipped pro-lifers locking arms.)
Bill: (as pro-lifer) She can't come in!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) She was 98. She was hit by a bus!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as pro-lifer) There's options!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) What else can we do? Have her stuffed?
Audience laughs.
Bill: I want to see pro-lifers with crowbars at funerals opening caskets - "get out!" Then I'd be really impressed by their mission.
"Pro-life conservatives are obsessed with the fetus from conception til' nine months, after that they don't want to know about you, they don't want to hear from you, know nothin'. No neo-natal care, no daycare, no headstart, no school lunch, no food stamps, no nothin'. If you're pre-born, you're fine, if you're pre-school you're fucked. Conservatives don't give a damn about you until you reach military age. Then they think you're just fine, just what they've been looking for. Conservatives want live babies, so they can raise 'em to be dead soldiers." ~ George Carlin
"If you're so pro-life, and you're so pro-child, then adopt one that's already here, and is very unwanted, and very alone, and needs someone to take care of it and get it out of a horrible situation. And people say 'Well, why don't you do that?' and I say 'Cause I hate fucking kids and couldn't care less'." ~ Bill Hicks
----
Bill Hicks: You know who s really bugging me these days. These pro-lifers ...
Smattering of applause.
Bill: You ever look at their faces? "I'm pro-life!"
(Bill makes a pinched face of hate and fear, his lips are pursed as though he's just sucked on a lemon.)
Bill: "I'm pro-life!" Boy, they look it don't they? They just exude joie de vie. You just want to hang with them and play Trivial Pursuit all night long.
Audience chuckles.
Bill: You know what bugs me about them? If you're so pro-life, do me a favour - don't lock arms and block medical clinics. If you're so pro-life, lock arms and block cemetaries.
Audience laughs.
Bill: Let's see how committed you are to this idea.
(Bill mimes the pursed lipped pro-lifers locking arms.)
Bill: (as pro-lifer) She can't come in!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) She was 98. She was hit by a bus!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as pro-lifer) There's options!
Audience laughs.
Bill: (as confused member of funeral procession) What else can we do? Have her stuffed?
Audience laughs.
Bill: I want to see pro-lifers with crowbars at funerals opening caskets - "get out!" Then I'd be really impressed by their mission.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
I think I was a member of the Recordist group, but it was totally dead, so I left. :shrug: