keepinguasecret

ok i know no one reads my rants on here hence y i am posting them on here.

so yea recently ended the most amazing relationship i have ever had! wasnt totally my choice, the girl ignored me for almost 2 weeks and when she did talk to me she would yell at me or start a fight, so i said talk to me now or we r over, well then i didnt hear from her for 2 days so i broke it off. we were engaged, i told her to talk to me and try and work things out w/ me if she wants me back. well she totally ignored me some more, was supposed to go to my best friends wedding with me and totally blew me off, to find out later that she was up in that area anyway. well at the wedding 3 ppl tried taking me home that night (y idk im nothing pretty or anything), well the one guy and i have been talking ever since then. before this i wasnt really into guys, like yea i thought they were hott and all but was fucked over too many times to try it again. and like i know its too soon for anything cuz he just got out of an engagement too but i am starting to really like him and idk what to do he likes me too cuz in a drunken stuper i confessed all my feelings for him. but my ex was told by someone i dont even talk to or know anyone who talks to them anymore(another ex) that i cheated on her with my other ex who is now a guy. well now i think i might have messed things up with this guy and idk what to do. i feel like such a fuck up, school isnt going so hott, at least i dont think so i threatened to drop out a few times already and its my senoir year, i cry myself to sleep almost every night anymore. i just dont know what to do!!!!! this semester cant end soon enough! i might be here for another year though BLAH. ok i think i am done now thank u for letting me get this out, i know on one will read it.