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katojoneso

United Kingdom

Member Since 2004

Followers 5 Following 4

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Friday Feb 25, 2005

Feb 24, 2005
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well,
Its time to write another journal, as that was depressing.
So hows you guys going?
Me im doing ok. Going out tonight and i cant wait as i have stayied in and relaxes all week because i have to get better.
My face is much better and if it keeps healing the rate it is healing ill end up with healthier and nicer skin before i had this satanic condition.
i in myself am feelin ok and i am feeling alot better about splitting up with my ex.
yknow i have too much fun and my life is better and more fun without him.
sounds harsh as man but i dont think i could be in another long term relationship for a fucking long time as i feel like i have wasted alot of my chldhood being with men.
so, its a new kato!
i changed my pic because i looked sad and i spose i was feeling pretty low when i took that but now im smiley and thats how i sorta feel.
yes some days are pretty sad, but thats only because i miss the company not the person.
my ex,ex boyfirend split up with his gal yesterday too (and he is fit)
but too boring for me.
lovely guy ad everything, but no direction in life, settled for the first thing that comes along cos its easier and thats not me i go for what i want and its hard but at least i have some life in me.
im not being funny but everyone i know is splitting up with theyre partners this year my family and friends. its weird.
ppl are dying and all this poo poo.
well i have dilemma.
when i was at school there was this guy who started to hang out with my mates and i properly hated him cos he was a bit of a dick and to be fair i didnt really give him a chance (i was sucha bitch at school, but changed and grew up when i left, phew!)
and when i got to know him a bit more i found that we really got on. So anyway we ended up going to the prom together as i had no one to go with as the guys there were not my sorta guys (chavs) and yknow they had all the preppy gals to go with. also i think they all looked upon me as theyre mate and i dunno, yeh well me and this guy went to the prom together and we went as friends.
and it was funny, when i left school we went to college together and he left like a year b4 i did and we lost touch and about month or so back we got in contact again through my best mate and we all go out together and now he has a crush on me and i dunno how to deal with it.
like him but just as a mate and my best mates boyfriend keeps telling me how much he wnts to be with me and likes me.
its uncomfortable now, he wont ring me cos he's too shy arrrggghhh how come things are too complicated?
i dont like him in that way yknow. he's my mate but i dont want to hurt his feelings and i dont want to stop hanging out with him because he is my mate.
anyway, its snowing and its cold and i dont like snow.
but all in all tonight is going to be wierd as.
why cant things be simple im not good at this single game as i cant deal with ppl having crushes on me sounds strange to you but when i found out it really annoyed me.
i dont know why, maybe because i like to be ppls mate more than a grilfriend god im a wierdo and i sound like a cunt, i know i do but this is how i feel and i cant help that.
hmm what do you guys think?
this is a rambling journal i know.
hope your all cool,
speak soon.
kat miao!!
x x x
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
aadam:
i've just had one of those moments when it all comes together and makes sense. It all points towards collage, i shall now devote all my time to following this.

Guys are generally thick/ ignorant when it comes to matters of the heart so my advice is be straight to the point.

Feb 25, 2005
cannibal:
Great to hear you're doing o.k. again! smile
Hope you had a fab night.
Being pals is so much easier without all the complications of love. If you really don't fancy him, it's better to let him know it sooner than later. The bigger the chance you stay pals.
Just do it gently.
Feb 25, 2005

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