katblue

Things that make me sad....

This has been a confusing week. So many things going on that I wonder if my head will stay on straight, or if it will just start spinning out of control. My biggest fear is I'll start screaming, and it just won't stop. I can feel it welling up deep down, almost perceptible, and it makes my hands shake. Meh. In the middle of all of this, my bf ships out overseas soon. I don't know how I'm going to take it. I hate his job, he hates his job, and I wish I could steal him and hide him away with me where they couldn't find him. He is my anchor, my heart,and my soul. I don't know what I'd do without him. I'm afraid to even think that something could happen, because if you think it, what happens if it comes to be? Crazy talk I know. I'm letting all of the stress get to me. I'm going to think happy, safe, safe, safe thoughts for him, and the other men. I wish I could hide them all. I wish suffering would end.

Why does it have to exist?