kadium

Not feeling much energy tonight. Still depressed, with a heavy dose of boredom after sitting around the office for eight hours with almost nothing to do. I mostly surfed Wikipedia, going from one random article to another, watch Stephen Colbert clips on his Web site and bounced back and forth between listening to Pelican and Kevin Smith's podcast.

That said, I have been sleeping better the last few days and I'm trying to force myself out into the world a little more instead of doing my usual disappearing act. I'm making an effort at least. I still need a major life overhaul.

A close friend, who's also been in a deep depression of her own for a while and pretty uncommunicative throughout, wrote to tell me she's been in and out of the hospital lately and that they think she might have lyme disease, which is something I know almost nothing about other than it's usually transmitted through ticks. I don't quite know what to make of it. I want to be supportive, but with the depression she's pushing everyone away and it's frustrating.

Guess I now know how much it sucks to be on that end of it.

There aren't that many people in the world I'm willing to say the words "I love you" to, but she's one of them. I've fucked up enough in the past though, I'm not sure she believes it. It's a strange, long story I don't have the energy for right now.