its strange that i really have no feeling about anything right now other than this twitching that is going on inside of me.
i dont know what to think about the whole jason thing and its hard to emote when is going on inside of my head right now. i think i just need to take a second to breathe and get it all out of me if that is possible.
both lizty and matie's journals have put a smile on my face today.
speaking of something that i shouldnt be posting on a journal, i know someone that thinks litz is cute but i cant say caz hes reading this. trust me its not the boy that sprayed the colonge on his crotch at the club caz that is just a sick and demented thing to do in public.
so there is this guy that wants me raped and killed he says. i dont really mind him. actually i think its call kinda a game.
he wants to see how far he can push me and its like ok whatever. if you think carrying on like a two year old is something that is for you then by all means.
so for the portion of my evening when i wasnt vomiting, i took up erin's suggestion and actually watched crossroads. i will never say that this is cimematic genius at work and that everyone and their motehr should see this damned movie but it wasnt really atha bad either.
(oh its not that i cant type tonight, something ib eing weird with the sg site and it wont let me see what i am typing up until the end of the entry . so just deal with it)
things are getting better for all of the freind base. i feel like something big is going to come at the end of the year.
you know that feeling that you have waited your whole life for something big to happen. i think this is it.
so terry asked me to go to disney with him. i feel bad about wanting to cancell out on him but you have to look at it from my side of the story.
its not that i dont want to go its a) that their are expectations for accepting the trip. b) its a lot of money to put on someone that you treat like dirt most of the time.
i am not in a place in my own life yet tha i can put compliactions on other people. i know that may not make sense to anyone but me but it makes a lot of sense where i am coming from.
finally heard the truth about the whole rape story and i feel terrible for
. its not so much what has taken place, its how her whole life was thrown into jeopardy for the fact that no one was too sure if they were going to believer.
i myself was not a believer not because i love her any less for the things she has done or not done, its because i am naive and i have been lied to and lead down the wrong path and confused by the whole mystery before.
and as someone that has surrived my own ordeal i know that i should be the first one to jump to her side.
i have always been the protector of all my freinds but for these reasons i couldnt allow myself to be on herr side about it. and i felt misrable about it.
but now that the shit has hit the fans and i know what i needed to know i feel whole again.
went to terminal bliss. fantastic although i didnt sty long trying to shake my flu.
i dont know what to think about the whole jason thing and its hard to emote when is going on inside of my head right now. i think i just need to take a second to breathe and get it all out of me if that is possible.
both lizty and matie's journals have put a smile on my face today.
speaking of something that i shouldnt be posting on a journal, i know someone that thinks litz is cute but i cant say caz hes reading this. trust me its not the boy that sprayed the colonge on his crotch at the club caz that is just a sick and demented thing to do in public.
so there is this guy that wants me raped and killed he says. i dont really mind him. actually i think its call kinda a game.
he wants to see how far he can push me and its like ok whatever. if you think carrying on like a two year old is something that is for you then by all means.
so for the portion of my evening when i wasnt vomiting, i took up erin's suggestion and actually watched crossroads. i will never say that this is cimematic genius at work and that everyone and their motehr should see this damned movie but it wasnt really atha bad either.
(oh its not that i cant type tonight, something ib eing weird with the sg site and it wont let me see what i am typing up until the end of the entry . so just deal with it)
things are getting better for all of the freind base. i feel like something big is going to come at the end of the year.
you know that feeling that you have waited your whole life for something big to happen. i think this is it.
so terry asked me to go to disney with him. i feel bad about wanting to cancell out on him but you have to look at it from my side of the story.
its not that i dont want to go its a) that their are expectations for accepting the trip. b) its a lot of money to put on someone that you treat like dirt most of the time.
i am not in a place in my own life yet tha i can put compliactions on other people. i know that may not make sense to anyone but me but it makes a lot of sense where i am coming from.
finally heard the truth about the whole rape story and i feel terrible for
. its not so much what has taken place, its how her whole life was thrown into jeopardy for the fact that no one was too sure if they were going to believer.
i myself was not a believer not because i love her any less for the things she has done or not done, its because i am naive and i have been lied to and lead down the wrong path and confused by the whole mystery before.
and as someone that has surrived my own ordeal i know that i should be the first one to jump to her side.
i have always been the protector of all my freinds but for these reasons i couldnt allow myself to be on herr side about it. and i felt misrable about it.
but now that the shit has hit the fans and i know what i needed to know i feel whole again.
went to terminal bliss. fantastic although i didnt sty long trying to shake my flu.
Saturday December 20 @ 8:00 PM
@ Atomic Cowboy - http://www.atomic-cowboy.com
7336 Manchester
The first ever SGSTL X-mas party will be held at The Atomic Cowboy in Maplewood, on Saturday, December 20th. The party will start at 8pm so that the festivities do not conflict with dinner and so that there will still be ample time to partake in the St. Louis nightlife. All SGSTL members are encouraged to bring guests. We will be having a gift exchange that night and all members will be required to bring one gift ranging from $5-$10. Member guests are allowed to partake in the gift exchange only if they bring a gift to contribute. Please RSVP ASAP on darkskyy1's page.