First off- not a kiss and tell person but if I can't share in relative anonymity here then what's the point?
So, interesting thought for me (and I already feel like a fucking adolescent writing this), I had this, we'll call it date on Sunday and it went well. There was much drinking (I am not much of a drinker at all) so... tipsy. There was dancing (as a result of a combo between the drinks and, frankly, her dancing ample booty) and close, cheek to cheek talking (a necessity because of the loud music).
Let me set up by saying I've had little to no female physical contact in the last six months since I was pretty much crushed by a long term girlfriend with whom we have eloping plans. We're talking like... 3-5 hugs at most even (Thanks you people). Crazy to think about when I actually think about it.
So we got to kissing while out then I walked her home as we were both quite tipsy and she invited me in. Middle middle middle... she invited me to "come upstairs" and my thought was "Am I ready for sex?" That's such a crazy thought but it's what I was thinking. I spent the night cuddling with her. No sex. I was never one to make a first move the first time, possibly a fear of rejection? Maybe the possibility of make a woman feel rushed into sex. That makes me a gentleman or something, right?
Now what? I'm asking myself questions... Did I 'ruin' my chances with this woman? Where is this going anyhow? Do I want something out of this more than sex or even sex?
I'm just fucking confused and ruined.
Thanks for reading it. A look into my messed up, underdeveloped little mind. You'd think I was antisocial or home-schooled or something.
I've always been a fan of kissing, though.
