justme159

Its Tuesday today and that means its my last full day in the house . Its sad, because this is the place where I am comfortable. I feel "at home" here. But, Dana comes back tomorrow...I can't change that. It was a fast 3 1/2 weeks that he was gone. I don't have very much packed...some but not a lot. Its hard to find the motivation to pack when you don't have anyplace to go. Sure, I can stay with my parents and I even have some friends who have offered up their spare rooms, but when you don't have a place of your own to go to that's more permanent, packing is hard. Its still just surreal.

Waiting to hear back from the apartment place is a killer, but that's all I can do...wait.

We'll see what happens when Dana gets back. We'll see what he has to say and what I have to say. A lot has happened and a lot has changed for me since he left...it will be interesting to see what has changed for him. And it will be interesting to see the dynamic of just being back together. Do I think we're going to "hook up"? No. I actually don't. Do I think he's changed his mind? Again, no. And do I think he's actually thought about the consequences of his actions? Maybe a little, but certainly not the way I have. There are times when I wonder if he's even thought about us (me and the baby) at all. I am sure he has, but sometimes I do wonder.

I guess we'll see how it all shakes out in the next few days and weeks. It will be interesting, that's for sure.




in the meantime, here is a pic i took of myself a few years ago that reminds me that "Life is a Blur":